This post-OTL RAW starts with a video about Laurinaitis. Old video of Laurinaitis, then stills from OTL last night. Further on to terrible things Laurinaitis’ done to people, then more stills from last night and Laurinaitis’ escape, but then Big Show, in a yellow oxford, drags Laurinaitis back to the ring. Video of Big Show, in tears, being fired last week. Laurinaitis pleading for mercy, then Big Show punching out Cena and Laurinaitis getting the win. Stills of little kids in the audience in shock of Cena’s loss.
In Ring Segment
Cena’s music hits and he comes stomping out to huge pop! He looks PISSED! Cena grabs a mic and paces the ring. There’s still some heat for him, but not much. He’s had many matches like this, then congratulates his opponent and moves on. “What the hell happened?” demands Cena. He’s really tightly wound up. John Laurinaitis beat me. Here’s the thing, it’s not how it happened, it’s why the hell it happened in the first place. ARG! Since Laurinaitis’ been here Laurinaitis has been a selfish, power hungry bully. They were having a blast, everything it was supposed to be. All People Power is supposed to be! Laurinaitis was getting his tail whipped, Cena was having fun, the fans were having fun.
They all knew Laurinaitis would be gone. Then he ran away. Big Show brought him back. Big Show. The guy Laurinaitis humiliated in this ring and fired in this ring. Brought Laurinaitis back and it was fun again. Giant hand around Laurinaitis scrawny neck. Cena gave Big Show a nod and said he had that one, and Big Show gave Cena Laurinaitis and he was sure Laurinaitis would be terminated. Then Big Show, a man he used to call a friend knocked him out cold. And the winner was Laurinaitis. Hind sight being 20/20 people asked why he toyed with him? Why not just beat him? If Laurinaitis had already paid off Big Show, if Laurinaitis was in any jeopardy of losing that match, the giant would beat him anyway. He’s glad he did all he did to Laurinaitis as he deserved it and ten times more.
What he’s not glad about is Big Show. The world’s largest athlete deciding to sell out. There’s no explanation to explain what Big Show did. Laurinaitis was going to be gone. Whoever the next GM would be, Vickie, Long, heck, bring the computer back! Bleep bling bloop, the next email would be “Could I have your attention please, we’re hiring Big Show back.” But instead he Benedict Arnolded him and they’re stuck. They’re stuck with that People Power garbage. Now we’ll see some graphic and he’ll come out and (Laurinaitis voice) telling us how brave he is, how hard he worked, the great new plan for the next review. This is crap!
Laurinaitis’ music and out comes Eve to the stage. Cena says Laurinaitis, you got really hot, but you still suck! Eve introduces John Laurinaitis, Executive Vice President of Talent Relations and permanent General Manager for RAW and Smackdown, and the man who beat John Cena last night. Laurinaitis out on a mobility Scooter with one crutch. On the stage he hands it to Eve and she helps wrench him to his feet. He uses the crutch and really shows off his old man pants. He says after the match he was rushed to the ER. He might have a broken clavicle, possible damage to his ACL, and PCL in his knee, and possible spinal injury and the contusions all over his body. He can’t lift his left arm or left leg which indicated possible nerve damage. “What?” That’s okay. “What?” When he’s in that ring he’s a fierce competitor. “What?” He reminds us that outside that ring he’s a WWE executive. He wants everyone to know they can’t lay a finger on him again. If they do they will be immediately terminated. Enough about him. He wants to introduce the man he rehired on Saturday. (But if any Superstars got involved, they’d be fired – that makes no sense.) A man who in four weeks Cena will face at No Way Out. The man who knocked Cena out, Big Show!
Out comes Big Show in a suit, sans tie. Cena spreads his arms and looks questioningly at Big Show. “You suck!” chants for Big Show. Big Show says he’s sure Cena and everyone else would like and explanation of his actions. None of them are entitled to his explanation. Last week on this show he was on his knees doing something he’d never done – begging for his job. No one loves this business like he does. The Superstars, the fans, the crew. He was so upset he found himself crying. All of them watched a giant crying on TV. “You’re a sellout!” I go no sympathy, NONE! 18 years of my life and NOTHIN’! He did what he had to do what everyone here would have done! Huge heat for Big Show. He has an iron clad contract now and is proud of it. How dare Cena, or any of them judge him! How dare they! Cena, – LOOK AT ME – I will be judging you on June 17th. There will be no way out. You, my friend, I’m going to knock out.
Big Show leaves and Otunga comes out. Otunga says Cena lost to Laurinaitis, now he’ll lose to him (Otunga). Cena says, David, I’m gonna tell you something real quick. I’m not in the mood. Go in the back and watch reruns of Law & Order, because if you get in this ring with me… If you get in this ring with me tonight, I promise you, I’m gonna hurt you.
So be it, says Otunga. Cena’s shirt comes off, then Long says wait a minute. Long then dedicates the match to Laurinaitis. He throws off his cape and poses on the top of the stage. Cena just glares at Otunga.
Recap of Big Show threatening Cena for NWO.
Cena vs Otunga (1:55)
Cena runs at Otunga who tries to flee. Cena pulled back, then at Otunga again who flees the ring. Cena out after him and Otunga in. Cena in and Otunga out. Cena is pissed! Dualing chants for Cena. Cena chases Otunga in and out and in. Otunga on Cena with blows on the mat. Otunga poses at Laurinaitis, but then Cena up and on Otunga with blows. Clothesline in a corner, then a clothesline in the center of the ring. Otunga up, hand in front of Cena’s face at Laurinaitis, then an AA. STF on Otunga who finally taps out.
Winner – Cena
Cena continues to hold the STF on Otunga. Hawkins and Reks come through the crowd and into the ring. They both jump Cena and start beating on him. Titus and Young join the fray, but then Sheamus’ music and he ran out – through Laurinaitis who was standing. Only Eve kept Laurinaitis on his feet. Sheamus out and they clear the ring. Hawkins was the last who was thrown out on the rest. Laurinaitis yells at the four of them and says he didn’t give them permission! Get back to the locker room. Go to the locker room now!
Cena, Sheamus, looks like the fans like to see them in action. In the name of People Power, they will be teaming up in a 2 On 3 Handicap Match. It will be a 2 On 3 Handicap Lumberjack Match. Laurinaitis’ music starts and he leaves on his Jazzy with a maniacal smile on his face. Cena raises Sheamus’ arm to cheers from the fans.
ADR vs Orton (7:21)
Ricardo grabs the mic, but Santino comes out US Title on his waist, cobra on hand. On youtube ADR and Santino got into it. Santino says he’s been listening to Ricardo for a while now and can’t understand anything he’s saying. His accent is ridiuulous, as ridicuuous as his eyebrows. He doesn’t know anything about inroductioning. He doesn’t know how to roll his R’s. Ricardo does it, then they get into an R rolling match. The cobra comes out and Ricardo trips back. Santino laughs at him for getting scared. “It’s not even a real cobra! It’s my arm in a cobra costume, stupid!” Ricardo gets caught up in his suit jacket. Santino winds up and nails Ricardo with the cobra. Santino is announcing ADR now. He says talks about ADR’s cars and the only one who drove into the building tonight. Form someplace in Mexico, Alberto, Del Rio. Santino rolls the R’s so much he has to stop and take a breath in the middle.
Cole says they’re reaching a milestone never reached before. Video starts.
Law & Order 465
The Simpsons 508
Only one show has reached a milestone this impressive, 1000th episode. July 23rd RAW will go to 3 hours.
ADR out in an 1961 Rolls Royce Silver Cloud in red and black. Santino leaves the ring when ADR gets in.
Orton’s music and the fans go wild. Orton poses and glares down at ADR outside.
They lock up. Side headlock on Orton who is backed into a corner. ADR doesn’t give a clean break and beats on Orton’s gut. ADR down and Orton flies, but ADR moves. ADR tries to work Orton’s arm, but Orton is free. Knee drop to ADR’s face.blows to ADR in a corner. The fans count, but Orton only gets four. ADR to the mat under the ropes, so Orton grabs him, but ADR through the ropes. A blow to Orton, then a low drop kick to Orton’s legs which knocks him from the apron to the floor.
Arm bar on Orton on the mat. Orton to his feet and free. Blows to ADR, but then ADR kicks and works that arm. Orton pinned for two. ADR jumps and stomps the back of Orton’s head for two. Arm bar on Orton on the mat. Orton to his knees, then feet and punches free, but is kicked and back to his knees.
ADR rushes Orton, but Orton ducks and ADR’s double kick goes through the ropes and out. ADR in and eats clotheslines! That sick power slam, then ADR to the apron. Orton’s sick DDT! Orton pounds the mat, but then Jericho is there, in black leather pants, no shirt, and Orton eats a code breaker!
Winner – Orton vs DQ
“You suck!” chants for Jericho. Jericho grabs a mic and says he’s the best in the world at what he does (in a strange voice). Jericho then yells it. Jericho yells it again. Jericho asks if Orton understands? Another cod breaker on Orton – but this one was TERRIBLY botched. Jericho yells again at Orton, asking if he understands. I’m the best in the world! Jericho drops the mic and is through the ropes, but then back in, pulls Orton up by his head and hits a third code breaker on Orton. Jericho leaves the ring and they replay Jericho’s attack to end the match and then two of the code breakers.
Bryan heading for the ring.
In Ring Segment
Bryan to the ring. He’s also looking really upset. Bryan looks around and the “YES!” starts. He says last night a great injustice was done. He should be the new WWE Champion! If we missed OTL, don’t take his word for it, see it for ourselves. He showed video of Punk tapping, but none of the noise. Bryan says question and answer time with Bryan. Did he make Punk tap out? “YES!” Should he be WWE Champion? “YES!” If he faces Punk will he make him tap out again? “YES!” “YES!” “YES!” But then the fans started chanting “NO!” “NO!” “NO!” “NO!” “NO!” He says the only reason he’s not WWE Champion is because of the gross incompetence of one ref and he demands a rematch!
Punk’s music and he comes out with a smirk, belt in hand. Punk wants to clear up any controversy from last night. “Truth be told, it was one of the greatest battles I’ve been in in my life.” But Bryan’s forgetting one thing, Punk beat him 1-2-3 in the center of the ring. He beat Bryan. He wants to remind Bryan of what went down on Smackdown last Friday night. Bryan attacked Kane with a chair and fled. Kane thought it was Punk who did it, so Kane beat the heck out of Punk as Bryan stood by and smirked.
Punk shakes his head and says it’s clever and he’s ashamed of himself for falling for it. Now he’s introducing Bryan’s opponent for this evening. Fire erupts!
Bryan vs Kane (1:49)
Kane out to the ring and Bryan doesn’t look happy. Punk is on announce! Cole asks how Punk could make this match. Punk says he wears all hats.
Kane rushes Bryan, Bryan with blows, but Kane gets the upper hand. Blows and kicks on Bryan in a corner. Bryan whipped and clothesline. Bryan double kicks Kane in a corner. Bryan climbs, but Kane catches him with one hand. Bryan gets free and pulls down a rope so Kane goes over. Bryan flies over onto Kane. Punk grabs a chair and is about to hit Kane. Bryan stops him and takes the chair. Kane gets up and sees Bryan with the chair. Big boot to Bryan, then Kane on him with the chair.
Winner – Bryan via DQ
Kane beats the heck out of Bryan with the chair. Then Kane sense Bryan into the ring. Chokeslam to Bryan in the center of the ring. Kane about to leave, but then stops and hits another chokeslam for good measure. Cole is about to have a hissy he’s so upset. Punk then says he’s going to check on Bryan. King loves this, Cole doesn’t. Punk pokes Bryan with a toe, then locks on the anaconda vice. A big smile, then Punk to his feet yelling “YES!” “YES!” “YES!” Fingers in the air and all!
Punk walking backstage and AJ runs up. She wants to tell him something. He says that she’s completely off her rocker. She says she liked watching him beat up Bryan. Punk says she’s off her rocker. She’s about to pull out her hair. Punk says he says she knows she’s been a fool this entire time. She breaks down in tears. He tells her it will be okay. He hugs her and pats her hair. He tells her over and over that everything is going to be fine. She stops dead, steps back and looks up at him. He says he sorta digs crazy chicks. He leaves and she starts shaking and whimpering.
Last week when Heyman got mouthy to Trip and Trip grabbed Heyman’s face. Later Heyman said he’d be suing Trip for the attack.
King and Cole talk about whether Brock and Heyman have a case against Trip.
Christian vs Jinder (3:26)
Justin announces Christian by explaining what Christian did last night and how he won the IC Title.
Stills from the People Power Battle Royal. He was going to face Santino, but Cody ticked him off. Christian hit the kill switch on Cody for the win.
Jinder places his headdress in the case, then he’s into the ring.
They lock up, but Jinder on Christian hard. Christian hits a back slam, then Christian flies onto Jinder. Jinder on the apron sends Christian over the top to the floor. Jinder out and sets Christian on the apron and hits a forearm. Knee drops while using the ropes for height. Suplex on Christian for two. Chinlock on Christian on the mat, but he’s up. Christian into the the corner face first. A mule kick, then Christian flies with a terrible sunset flip! Chops, then Christian takes Jinder down. Christian outside and slaps Jinder through the ropes. Christian sitting up top and hits a back elbow. Jinder reverses the kill switch. Jinder comes back with a knee to Christian’ face. Christian reverses on Jinder and hits the kill switch. Christian climbs, then hits a 5 star frog splash! Christian gets his three.
Winner – Christian
Kelly with a vacant smile heads for the ring.
They show Tweets talking about what Big Show did at OTL. Then on to video of Big Show yelling at Cena.
Kelly vs Beth (2:23)
Kelly out in red, white and blue. Mostly blue with white stars. Beth out in black to face her. Still from OTL when Layla beat Beth last night.
Beth takes Kelly down and stomps her. Kelly picked up and slammed to the mat. Back elbow drop. More stomping on Kelly for two. Layla watching backstage, shaking her head. Kelly in control, head scissors takes Beth down, but Beth drops Kelly and pulls her up by her hair. Kelly slammed by her hair. Kelly whipped, but moves and Beth eats corner. Thesz Press on Beth, then tilt-a-whirl head scissors and Kelly really works Beth over in the corner while screeching. Kelly flips across the ring for a back elbow, but a double fist to the back of Kelly’s head/neck. Glamslam for three.
Winner – Beth
Layla is still watching. Video of the end of the match. King thinks Kelly was knocked out from that blow. Beth poses, then leaves the ring as Kelly barely moves with the ref tending to her.
More Tweets, these from the Superstars as they talk to the good and bad about Laurinaitis winning.
Laurinaitis rolling around backstage on his mobility scooter, with the big People Power logo on the front. Laurinaitis still has that huge silly smile on his face.
Sheamus & Cena vs Swagger & Dolph w/ Vickie & Tensai w/ Sakamoto (17:11)
Sheamus out to the ring to solid pop. He poses in the ring. Cena’s music and he’s out to the ring. EXCUSE ME! EXCUSE ME! Vickie out in a black and pink tie dyed shirt with a white pattern on the chest, and skinny black pants. She yells about teaching Cena and Sheamus to respect authority. She announces Swagger and Dolph. They all wait on the stage for Tensai. Tensai out, and stomps to the ring with Sakamoto behind him, the rest follow suit. The lumberjacks to the ring – all heels. Hawkins, Reks, Young, O’Neil, Jericho, McIntyre, Mason Ryan, Primo, Epico, Otunga, ADR and Jinder from what I can see. There might be more I’m missing.
Dolph and Sheamus lock up. Dolph sent to the mat. Side headlock on Dolph, then taken down. Dolph up into a shoulder block. Laurinaitis to stage on his crutch. Dolph raised in the air and dropped for two. Cena tags in, as does Swagger. Swagger smiles, behind Cena and takes him down. Swagger celebrates. Pushups, but then Swagger is dropped with a HUGE clothesline! That sounded sick! Tans tags in. back elbow to Cena, then Cena in heel corner, Tensai on him with blows. Swagger tags in and shoulder blocks in the next corner. Cena whipped and falls to the mat. Swagger tries for his splash but Cena moves.
Sheamus in with clotheslines, then Swagger in a corner. Swagger slammed to the mat for two, Dolph breaks the count. Sheamus throws Dolph out, but nothing. Tensai in and Sheamus with blows, then Sheamus tossed out. The Colons on Sheamus, then Sheamus doves off the stairs on the heels. Jericho tries to grab Sheamus as he crawls in, but Cena stomps Jericho. Tensai on Sheamus in heel corner. Swagger tags in and stomps Sheamus as Vickie screeches. Cheap attack on the apron from Dolph. Tensai in and chin hold on Sheamus.
Swagger trying to keep Sheamus from Cena. He ducks a Brogue kick and drags Sheamus to his corner. Tensai tags in. they exchange blows. “Albert!” chants. Sheamus into a corner, Tensai splashes his back. Tensai rolls Sheamus out with a foot. Jericho on Sheamus hard, others not so much, Sheamus gets back into the rope. Swagger tags in and tries to work Sheamus, but eats some blows. Forearms to Swagger, but a drop toe hold takes Sheamus down. Front facelock on the match and he rolls Sheamus from Cena.
Dolph tags in, but Sheamus gets Dolph up. Dolph wiggles free and chop block. Zig/zag on Sheamus for two. Dolph grabs Sheamus ankle so he can’t tag out. Swagger tags in and on Sheamus with stomps. Big Show is now up on stage. Swagger pins Sheamus for two. Arm hold on Sheamus who gets up and head butts Swagger to get free. Head butts, but Swagger grabs Sheamus around the waist and takes him down. Sheamus in the ropes takes a Dolph boot to the head. Sheamus in heel corner.
Tensai tags in and kicks Sheamus in the gut over and over, then stomps him down in heel corner. Sheamus on Tensai with blows, but Tensai is too much and then Tensai slams Sheamus to the mat for two. Dolph tags in and blows on Sheamus in the corner. Swagger tags in and stomps Sheamus. Sheamus tries to fight back. Blows to all three, big punch to Swagger nose, then Swagger up for a rolling senton.
Cena tags in. clotheslines on Dolph in what Cole calls ‘Classic’ Cena. Dolph slammed to the mat, the lumberjacks attack Sheamus. Cena out to help, then the lumberjacks in and beating down on both Sheamus and Cena.
The rest of the locker room clears. Punk, Kofi, R-Truth, Christian, Khali, Funkasaurus, Santino and Cena leaves the ring. Huge fight in the ring, the faces gaining control, but Cena is backstage.
Cena runs up to Laurinaitis and Laurinaitis demands to know why Cena wants. Cena wants to know where Big Show is. Laurinaitis tells Cena that he can’t touch Laurinaitis or will be fired. Cena snaps his head closer to Laurinaitis who flinches.
Laurinaitis starts leaving, Cena turns around into a fist. Big Show looks down at Cena out cold on the floor, then walks off. The camera looks down at Cena as RAW goes off the air.
Most interesting reactions
Bryan – “YES!” “YES!” “YES!” & “NO!” “NO!” “NO!”
Tensai – Albert
Thanks for reading,