Smackdown! or Being in Limbo

Opening Thoughts

Because I’m in a rush (happens a lot lately :/) I’ll just explain the title of the blog: You’ll notice that no eventful things happened on this episode of Smackdown, but we got some pretty good wrestling. I’ll take that. Are we ready? Let’s get to SMACKDOWN!

Big Show Explains His Actions…Again

So, I’m getting really tired of hearing why Big Show did what he did and how he doesn’t care about anyone but himself. Maybe I’m in the minority, but the whole “I’m only watching out for me, myself, and nobody” type of heel are the most boring. Their promos practically consist of nothing but the phrases “I don’t care about you,” and “I only care about myself.” The interruption of “Serious” Brodus Clay was actually fairly welcome until he tried to rush the ring, and physically couldn’t. The “rush” turned into an attempted slide into the ring and a struggle to his feet. I do, however, like how Big Show made Clay look like a million bucks. Really, Show didn’t need to sell like that for Brodus, but in doing so, made the Funkasaurus look very strong. I feel like this whole Show/Clay storyline should go somewhere. I don’t want to see Brodus just be a guy to fall victim to Show’s attacks as a proving point. I’d also like to point out that the “You Can’t Wrestle” Chants HAD to have been directed at David Otunga. Everyone knows that Paul Wight can wrestle…just like everyone knows David Otunga can’t. But what can David Otunga do? A pretty mean Carlton dance. That’s what.

Segment Grade: D+

RYBACK SMASH

Again, I’m not super opposed to keep watching Ryback squash jobbers as long as he continues to do so in innovative ways. That being said, I read that he’s in line for a push, and as long as he eases into it and doesn’t just catapult to the main event, I’m all for it. I think the fans are behind Ryback now, and if you don’t believe me, listen to the crowd chant “Feed Me More” after the match.

Match Grade: SQUASH

Don’t be a bully, be a STAR…but racist comments are okay in my book.

Only because I’m half-Asian and incredibly okay with clearly joking racist jokes did I not take offense to the sushi comment by Vickie Guerrero. However, I can totally see where someone would be offended at that. Anyways, let’s not make too much of this (too late) and say that the segment was totally whack.

Segment Grade: C

Alberto del Rio vs. Christian

I’m not sure what to make of this match. The go-home and falses definitely made this a highly compelling contest, but the rest of the match was kind of forgettable. I don’t fault Christian for this, but, as you all may know, I’m not a huge del Rio fan. I think his attitude and his demeanor in the ring has changed for the better, but I really can’t get behind a guy who does the exact same stuff to the exact same body part each match. Also, given his current status backstage in WWE, I’m surprised at his victory here. To me, the only thing that makes sense is that they were setting up for a “kick him while he’s down” attack from Cody Rhodes, which looked okay, but I feel like there could have been a better set up. Maybe have Christian win and then del Rio and Rodriguez attack him afterwards? I don’t know, but I’m just surprised at the outcome. I like the idea of Cody Rhodes going with a more personal investment in this angle as opposed to just wanting the IC belt back.

Match Grade: B-

Kane vs. Daniel Bryan

“Guest Time Keeper” is a great way of saying “This person’s going to have a direct outcome on the finish of the match.” The other problem I have with “Guest Time Keeper” is that really, they’re a bell ringer. Did you see AJ with a watch? Neither did I…but I wasn’t looking at her wrists. (Ba-dum ching) I enjoyed this match. It told a good story, both men have worked well with each other in the past, and know how to get the crowd invested. Notable moments in the match include Kane catching Daniel Bryan off the Flying Headbutt into a chokeslam setup. The finish of the match, with AJ confusing the heck out of EVERYBODY, was great. I love what work AJ has been doing and how she’s being booked. I keep waiting for a punchline, for the other shoe to drop, but I’m also liking what’s going on in the present time. The saga continues…

Match Grade: B+

Mick and Cheap Pops…oh and Zack Ryder vs. Heath Slater

Um…what was this about? Why is Heath Slater basically becoming the butt of a ton of jokes? Vader? Cyndi Lauper? Being Squashed by Z-Ryder? Weird.

Segment/Match Grade: C-

Zack? A Miscreant? No. Way.

Ooooh, are we going to see a Damien Sandow/Zack Ryder angle? I’m a fan of it simply because it PUTS DAMIEN IN AN ANGLE. You’re welcome.

Segment Grade: B+

The Usos vs. The PrimeTime Players

Could YOU say dead crowd? Even though the Usos tried their best to get the crowd behind this one, nobody could give two (expletives) about The PrimeTime Players. I, on the other hand, really like the energy and charisma they bring. I could see the arguement that they need some work in the ring, but it takes more than that to be successful. As for the match, it was fairly plain…there wasn’t really even a hot tag, so that didn’t exactly help with the story dynamic. The finish looked like it could have been REALLY botched, but it turned out alright. I’m hoping that the PTP are just the shot in the arm for the tag team division. If the feud with The Colons takes off, we could see some very entertaining matches going on. Another best of five? Hmm…oh, I also was a huge fan of the no-words-necessary punch in the face from Primo.

Match Grade: B-

Santino And No Reason.

No, really, what the hell was this?

Segment Grade: FFFFFFFFFFFFF

Dolph Ziggler vs. Sheamus

Almost, but not quite, on the same note as the Ryback matches, I don’t mind seeing the same matches over again, as long as there is innovation. Now, because I was on vacation last week (which is why there wasn’t a blog for last week’s episode), I didn’t see No Way Out, but I hear the match these two had was off the charts. As someone who didn’t get to see the PPV match, I very much appreciated this showing. So, can someone in the blogging universe help me? How repetitive was this match? I loved every second of it, and Dolph Ziggler is a man who you want in the ring with you to make you look like a champion any day of the week. I know Sheamus holds his own, but Ziggler is an amazing professional wrestler. Instead of giving thoughts to Ryback and the main event scene, strap Ziggler and let’s see what he can do. I would love to see him take the belt at SummerSlam or, at the very least, win the Money in the Bank briefcase. Sheamus and CM Punk are the epitome of what a champion should be in the modern day WWE. These two both bring prestige and value back to their belts, not only by being scripted to hold on to it for as long as they have, but also by ensuring that their matches’ stories make both competitors look like 100% contenders. May these two have many happy returns against each other in the future. The Rocker Dropper off of the stairs and the dropkick on the apron were my favorite spots of the entire match.

Match Grade: A+

Recap

In-Ring Action: A- Three good matches, and one of those was outstanding, make for a great grade in this category. The tag match could have been better, but at least both teams got exposure. Only two squash matches was a nice touch, and one of those featured two main roster members.

Out-of-Ring Action: DThe Santino segment and the Mick Foley segments were so terrible (The biggest problems with the Mick segments were just what happened as a result; Mick talking was fine), they could not have pulled this category out of the doldrums. On top of that, the Big Show schtick is getting old, fast.

Overall: B-Again, as I said, this show wasn’t really newsworthy, but the matchups of Sheamus/Ziggler, Kane/Bryan, and del Rio/Christian just couldn’t warrant a C grade. With Money in the Bank looming, I look forward to seeing some qualifying matches.

Outside the Blog Zone

Recap of my life for the last two weeks: WORK, Chicago Vacation, EXTRA WORK, Preparing for BRIAN KENDRICK this SATURDAY at MPX. Hopefully the next blog will be up within the requisite 24 hours of the show’s conclusion. …along with Guy’s Rundown at some point…I have to cover for him this upcoming week. Until next week, thank you for making me your CHOICE for Smackdown blogging!

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