Impact Results 11//28/13 – Winner, Winner, Turkey Dinner

TNA Impact Results November 28, 2013
From Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Reported on by Kendra Bunyon For Wrestling News World

I leaned wrong on my wrist late last night, so I’m going to be giving you the most basic of results tonight. I greatly appreciate your understanding!

Impact Starts

Video

Recap of last week’s Impact.

Backstage Segment

A coffin, Anderson talking about the passing of A&8′s.

In Ring Segment

Dixie gets huge heat. “AJ!” chants. She announces her new Chief of Staff – Rockstar Spud. Spud out in his tiny little tux, very sparkly belt buckle, and horrid orange fake tan. Spud talks up Dixie in a huge way. She presents a turkey under a dome that’s for the winner of a match later. EC3 out, and I noticed for the first time he has a bit of a lisp.

Commercial

Curry Man vs EC3

Curry Man! This is the perfect night for him to be on Impact, but I wash he was facing someone other than EC3. “You can’t wrestle chants for EC3.

Winner – EC3 (3:37)

Backstage Segment

Angle talks with Gunner. Storm is still mad, even though Gunner again pleads his reason for throwing in the towel. Storm’s not thrilled, but willing to work with him.

Commercial

Backstage Segment

Zema Ion! He looks great! Ion was glowing back there, just wish he wasn’t with Bromance. I was thrilled to see ODBEY, until he had 2 turkey suits.

Velvet Sky vs Lei’D Tapa

Ugh! Why did they have Tapa in the ring? What a mess! Felt bad for Velvet.

Winner – Tapa (3:38)

Commercial

Bromance vs Norv & Dewey

Ion as a DJ? He looks healthy and happy if a bit thin. I was hoping that Norv and Dewey won, but they seemed to have a blast dancing in those suits. Honestly, that was better than usual, but I miss the old suit.

Winners – Bromance (0:19(

Commercial

Backstage Segment

Dixie freaking about AJ is just too much. She’s so fake!

Backstage Segment

TNA with a drug test? Don’t believe that every happened!

Commercial

Backstage Segment

Spud arguing about Thanksgiving Dinner was kind of funny, yet kind of lame.

Backstage Segment

Magnus and Angle had a lovely heartfelt talk about teaming tonight, then facing off next week. They were honest and sweet to each other.

Video

EY bawling over A&8′s dying was priceless, but then Anderson came out of the casket. Anderson spoke about the time he spent in A&8′s, how much they took from him. Angle talked about D’Lo and how his head wobbles, then pulled a bobble head out and threw it in the casket. Joe handed out beers and said, “May you ride your mopeds to the shores of Valhalah.” Tenay is pissed he still has to work with Taz, but he’s glad Taz’s nasty smelly cut will be gone. “I don’t know how Brooke’s booty shorts got under here, but we will lay them to rest, as well. EY is there to shed a tear for the ones who won’t wear this – the old turkey suit – but don’t worry, he has more. EY broke down in tears over the casket. Anderson back up with the hammer, said he’ll keep it, it’s a good hammer.

Bully in and threatens Anderson. Says he needs to sleep with one eye open, and think about his pregnant wife. Get ready for battle.

Commercial

Backstage Segment

They, for some odd reason, keep showing Spud harass the cook for better food.

Elimination Tag Team Match – Team Roode (Roode & Sabin & Daniels & Kaz) vs Team Angle (Angle & Magnus & Storm & Magnus)

Angle and Roode started. Storm and Gunner worked well together. Sabin rushed in, Gunner looked up at him, Sabin fled the ring in fear. After beating down Gunner outside, Sabin was able to eliminate Storm. Team Roode worked over Magnus quite a bit, kept him from tagging out until he was able to take Daniels down. Gunner on Kaz looked strong until he was double teamed by BI behind Brian’s back. Magnus in the heel corner, cut off again.

Commercial

Just before the break Magnus tweaked his knee, and during the break he had to be helped to the back. Angle is all alone out there against the four others. Angle, of course, looked great beating all four of the other guys down, including hitting three Germans on Roode, then on Daniels, then on Kaz – though Kaz’s looked rough until he doubled up with a German on Kaz and Daniels! Double ankle lock on BI! Roode in with a chair, but Angle ducks and hits an Angle slam on him. Angle hit Roode with a chair and Brian called for the bell. Angle keeps beating on Roode until Kaz rescues him.

Winners – Team Roode vs DQ (18:19)

Commercial

Backstage Segment

Roode is sure that he can always beat Angle, and just proved it again.

Backstage Segment

Hervey asked Storm and Gunner if they had a plan as a team. They argue a bit, Gunner gets pissy and stomps off.

Video

Reviewing the final four going to the TNA WHC.

Commercial

Spud introduces all the heel winners to the ring for their turkey dinner. Velvet is tossed out so Ion would have a seat, though Kim sits and Tapa stands. Roode says what he’s thankful for, then Daniels does, and Kaz. Kim is thankful for Tapa and for being the prettiest and most dominant Knockout in the company, oh, and her family. Sabin is thankful for the beautiful hair on his head, greatest X Division Champ of all time, and oh, Velvet Sky. Jesse talks up Ion, part of Bromance, then Robbie gets in on it, thrilled they didn’t have to wear the turkey suits.

Angle – I don’t see a ring full of winners, I see a ring full of turkeys.

Roode talked big, then Angle brought his friends. Kim was the Champ to get the pie in the face, courtesy of Velvet. Norv and Dewey, still in their turkey suits, climbed, flapped and flew onto Bromance while ODBEY directed. Everyone in the ring had a beer – ODBEY, Storm, Gunner, Velvet, Norv and Dewey.

Queen of WNW
KB

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  • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

    I’ll be surprised if I have anyone to talk to tonight, but I’m here.

  • Craig

    Hi I am here don’t really like/watch TNA but I’ll keep u company!!

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      Yay! I’m writing the basic results, but not full results. Watching Dixie could make everyone ill.

  • The Breaker

    I’m actually watching Impact alone tonight so I’d be happy to join you guys! Happy Thanksgiving! This episode has Roode vs. Angle so that automatically makes this a better show than RAW.

    And on a side note, Spud is over-the-top cheesy and kinda creepy in this new role… and I think it’s a good thing!

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      That tiny tux is hysterical. I’m writing a very basic live results, so I’m going to be a little spotty, but I’m here!

      • The Breaker

        Always good to have you to chat with! And I’m sure it’s a relief not having to do the second-by-second coverage like you do for RAW.

        • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

          I still have people over, plus I tweaked my wrist. Alex always takes tonight off, and I offered to at least open the OTP, but basic results are easy.

          • The Breaker

            Hope that wasn’t the wrist you need to lift your fork! Have you gotten any of the others at least curious about wrestling?

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            No, actually, my daughter Ellie’s father is leaving because of the wrestling, but that was the plan.

            I tweaked my left wrist, and I’m a righty – so I was all set for shoveling food.

          • The Breaker

            That worked out well then. Sounds like an uptight person to leave because of what’s on the TV (I mean it’s not like you turned on anything sexually explicit or whatever). But you still got to shovel food, so that makes for a fun time.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            He brought a leg of lamb, and wasn’t a total tool, so we didn’t have to throw him out earlier. We were ready if we had to.

          • The Breaker

            You’ve had to make him leave before?

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            I took his daughter from him about ten years ago, and she’s not biologically mine, and he and I were only vaguely friends at the time. She needed someone to love and care for her, and that’s what I did. She called me Mom and he about had a seizure over it earlier.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            And yes, I’ve thrown him him out numerous times, and have done it on a holiday once.

          • The Breaker

            Was he abusive toward her?

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            Verbally and emotionally, not physically.

          • The Breaker

            It’s terrible to live in an environment like that. So you were with her father after you took her, or…?

          • The Breaker

            It’s terrible to live in an environment like that. So you were with her father after you took her, or…?

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            Nope, he was a friend of my boyfriend at the time. He and I were vaguely friends, nothing more. She needed someone to take care of her and care for her, I gave her a safe place and someone who cares.

          • The Breaker

            Oh okay. So would you say that he acts the way he does out of resentment?

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            He acted that way when he did have her, nothing has changed. That’s why I took her, he was just treating her so badly. I know he doesn’t like that she left him for me, but she was smart enough to know what she needed,and I was offering.

          • The Breaker

            Hopefully he too realizes what’s best for her.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            He doesn’t, and I doubt he will, but she does, and that’s all that really matters.

          • The Breaker

            True. Do they even speak often?

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            No! He wished her a happy birthday, was being nice, brought up Thanksgiving and we offered him an invite. She only speaks to him a couple times a year, if that. She hadn’t seen him in a couple years before today.

          • The Breaker

            It sucks to have that kind of relationship with a parent, but she has all she needs with you.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            It’s better than her relationship with her biological mother! And he was best to get custody at the time.

            I love her dearly, and she’s a great kid.

          • The Breaker

            No wonder she’s a great kid. She was lucky enough to have you!

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            Thanks. We’re both lucky.

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      Liking the look of this Angle/Roode teams match. Storm will have to turn heel here, or at least get pissy at Guns.

      • The Breaker

        I just kind of assumed that Gunner would be the one to turn, but it really could go either way now that I think about it.

  • The Breaker

    Curry Man!

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      Yay!

      • The Breaker

        Do you know who it is under the mask?

        • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

          Daniels. I love how he was fired, then Curry came in for a year, then he was fired and Daniels came back.

          I love that he plays this quirky character!

          • The Breaker

            I suspected Daniels, but the hair in the back of the mask made me second guess it.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            It’s fake. Curry Man is Daniels’ character.

          • The Breaker

            Yeah, I just wasn’t sure if they decided to hand it off to someone else for a one-off. Daniels has personality oozing through his pores! I love it!

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            Just the way he moves, so obviously Daniels. I love that he has this character to play with when he wants.

  • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

    Turkey suits! 2 of them! Zema Ion! He looks great! So excited to see him back, and looking less dorky! I wish he wasn’t with the Bromance, but he looks thrilled to be there!

    • The Breaker

      Wish he could’ve returned on a more important show, but it’s good to see him back anyway. Two turkey suits? This is high-stakes!

      • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

        He just looks so happy, though thin!

  • The Breaker

    Am I seeing things wrong, or did Tapa have a couple halfway decent looking moves there?

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      I didn’t see them, but was a bit distracted by my disgust for her.

      • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

        Figured it would be a quiet night.

      • The Breaker

        Totally understandable!

  • David Jr.

    I came here late, doesn’t look like many are here.

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      No, I was alone for the fist 1/2 hour.

      • David Jr.

        Went to my aunt’s for thanksgiving, just got home, this was my first thanksgiving without my father. Though if you can tell by my new pic, I had a good one.

        • The Breaker

          Congrats on the blowout win!

          • David Jr.

            It was strange, I’m so use to that happening to the Lions on Thanksgiving, to see the Lions actually do that to the Packers was shocking.

          • The Breaker

            It was definitely a feel good game, except for the Packers fans of course.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            So Gesus should be cranky, gotcha!

          • David Jr.

            It’s a rarity that a Lion fan can be prouder than a Packer fan.

          • David Jr.

            I know some Packer fans might say it would be different if Aaron Rodgers played, but the Lions D-Line was so dominate today, I don’t think even Rodgers would been much difference.

        • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

          I’m glad you had a nice day. I can’t imagine how hard that must be.

          • David Jr.

            It was strange not watching the Lions game with him. Though at my aunt’s house we were watching this Thanksgiving movie, I have no idea what it was about, but Emily Rose was the star.

  • The Breaker

    Is Ion a DJ in his spare time?

  • The Breaker

    Nice! These guys are so much fun to watch!

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      They came in not caring, because they were not really on the roster, and because of it they had fun, and the fans love them! Axel needs to watch these guys.

      • The Breaker

        Axel needs to loosen up like those two. Everything about the way he does his character is mechanical. Maybe giving him a face role where he can be more goofy will help.

        • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

          He needs to relax! He might be great if he learned to calm down and show some of himself.

  • The Breaker

    The return of AJ should be interesting, though I’m not looking forward to hearing Dixie on mic.

  • The Breaker

    That was an odd reference to the Hulkster and Brooke…

  • BlazeKing

    This segment is the funniest I’ve seen in a while!

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      This is really strong. Long live Anderson!

  • The Breaker

    Brooke’s booty shorts under the announce table? LOL!

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      That was great!

  • The Breaker

    I knew the hammer was coming too!

  • BlazeKing

    AhHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

  • The Breaker

    “The final awakening”… some cryptic words from Bully Ray!

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      He did a great job of it, but it was Tenay who impressed me with some silliness. He rarely shows that.

      • The Breaker

        He took me by surprise. Didn’t know if he could pull that off but he did!

        • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

          He was great! Shades of the guy I used to like in WCW.

  • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

    What lovely teams! This could have been a serious Traditional SvS Match. Of course that’s why they’re doing it, but that’s TNA for you.

    • The Breaker

      Another instance of TNA playing copycat. I hope they get away from doing that. So it’s interesting that Magnus is still on the face team. He really hasn’t gone full heel, but it’s a dangerous place to be for someone who still isn’t fully established.

      • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

        Kofi and Miz are doing the same thing, and just as well.

        Actually, I should have said just like the WWE, because this is a lovely match so far.

        • The Breaker

          Good point about Kofi and Miz. I almost forgot about that. Nobody’s really into what they’re doing but it does have the potential to be interesting.

        • The Breaker

          Good point about Kofi and Miz. I almost forgot about that. Nobody’s really into what they’re doing but it does have the potential to be interesting.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            I’ve been drawn in. I like that it’s so different from the good vs evil characters and storylines.

          • The Breaker

            I agree. Standard face/heel alignments can be tiresome, especially because so many of the characters in WWE are generic.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            I know good vs evil works so well, but it’s refreshing to see something different, though I have to admit I wish it was someone other than Kofi and Miz.

          • The Breaker

            It’s such an oft repeated rivalry. But I am intrigued at possibility of Kofi turning heel. That probably won’t happen in the end, but he really needs something to renew people’s interest in him.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            I would love to see Kofi turn heel. I don’t know if he can do it.

          • The Breaker

            He’s a born crowd-pleaser, so making the turn would be a huge test. He would need to change parts of his moveset too. And I’m not sure if he has the intensity to play a strong heel, so I think he’d have to be the wimpy type.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            Or he could be great! Doubt it, but it’s possible.

  • David Jr.

    So Sabin’s in this match, so what was with them never saying his name a few weeks ago?

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      No clue.

      • David Jr.

        Before today, I almost forgot he was the X-Division Champion, which is sad because TNA was build on the X-Division.

        • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

          I did forget until they mentioned it. I love the X Div, the foundation of what TNA was, and should be, yet they’re nothing thanks to Hogan.

  • The Breaker

    Storm got eliminated just like that? Lame.

  • The Breaker

    Daniels and Kaz did the Ascension’s tag finisher!

  • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

    Was wondering how they were going to end that after Mags faked the knee.

  • David Jr.

    So what’s their Main Event going to be?

  • The Breaker

    What’s a Thanksgiving wrestling show without the top heel ending up with pie in their face?

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      True, very true.

      • The Breaker

        I always think back to the Big Show Thanksgiving segment on SmackDown several years ago.

  • The Breaker

    Leave it to EGO to throw in a line about fornicating with pumpkin pie!

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      I know they’re heels, but I wanted to slap Kim. Though I’m sure she’s disgusted with the food compared to what her hubby makes.

      • David Jr.

        Plus Bobby Roode’s and Gail Kim’s Thanksgiving would have been last month.

        • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

          Roode said it, then I realized it was Kim as well. But I’m now dreaming of what her hubby would cook…

          • David Jr.

            Who wouldn’t love to have a professional chef in their family to cook Thanksgiviing dinner? I’d pick Giada De Laurentiis over Gail Kim’s husband to cook mine.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            And why would that be? Honestly, Irvine wouldn’t be my first pick, but I wouldn’t say no to a hot meal from him either.

          • David Jr.

            Are you really asking or are you asking that sarcastically?

          • David Jr.

            Are you really asking or are you asking that sarcastically?

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            Some of both.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            Some of both.

          • David Jr.

            Partially because she’s an attractive woman, but also because she’s one of the only few I know by name, her and Rachel Ray.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            Okay, that does make sense. She is quite attractive, and has a decent sense in the kitchen, but I think she’s better at marketing her brand. Not saying it’s a bad thing, it is what it is.

          • David Jr.

            Well I’m gonna call it a night, I hope you had a good Thanksgiving. And if you’ll be there, I’ll talk to you tomorrow.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            I will see you then. Have a nice night.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            I will see you then. Have a nice night.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            I will see you then. Have a nice night.

  • The Breaker

    Are they really making Ion’s entire gimmick a sound effect? I know it’s annoying and gets the job done, but he’s capable of more than that.

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      He was really starting to shine before he became ill. He looks so thin, but also healthy.

      • The Breaker

        I honestly wasn’t a fan of his, but then he started improving leaps and bounds in the ring. Bad timing for an injury, but he looks great now. I want him to get back into the ring instead of playing sound effects for Bro Mans.

        • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

          I agree. I was really hard on him from word go, but just before he left I was really starting to become impressed, and said as much.

  • David Jr.

    Bro Mans the greatest TNA Tag Team Champions of all time? That’s like saying Too Cool is the greatest WWE Tag Team Champions of all time.

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      Be nice to my local boy! They weren’t the best, but they weren’t the worst!

    • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

      Be nice to my local boy! They weren’t the best, but they weren’t the worst!

      • David Jr.

        Who is your local boy?

        • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

          Scotty is from Maine.

        • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

          Scotty is from Maine.

          • David Jr.

            I’m sorry, I was trying to think of a tag team in the WWE, that you wouldn’t never say was the greatest, but were an actual team that won the titles, Too Cool was the first that came to mind.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            I really do understand that. I was thinking of Funaki and his partner.

          • David Jr.

            Taka Michinoku? I don’t think they ever were Tag Team Champions. I just thought of the Nasty Boys, they’re worse than Too Cool.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            I thought they were. I saw Nasty Boys live, Saggs was so sweet, and Nasty was @#$%^&*(*&^%$ nasty!

          • David Jr.

            According to Funaki’s Wikipedia page, the only titles he held in WWE were the Hardcore and Cruiserweight.

          • http://www.wrestlingnewsworld.com/ Kendra Bunyon

            Huh. Then I will move on to the Hollys. Not horrible, but not great in many ways.

    • mike

      What about The Spirit Squad? They were awful Tag Team Champions