Weekly Rundown: The veterans show us how it’s done

Feel free to do your own rundown via the comment section in the future (writing little notes as you watch the shows could be very engaging and fun – give it a try and tell us via the comment section what you wound up with)

A reminder: This blog reflects MY views, and my views alone. It is by no means objective. If you disagree – which is encouraged – feel free to voice your opinion (in a civil manner) in the comments section. Let’s get some healthy debates going. Also, I am always open to constructive criticism of the writing format, phrasing, etc.

Hello everyone and welcome back to the Wrestling News World Weekly Rundown. This is your feature where you can read my thoughts of the week that was in professional wrestling – most specifically WWE (as these will be a lot longer, and more negative if I wrote up… or at all watched Impact Wrestling). So let’s get to the action with the Constants:

+ Daniel Bryan, Drew McIntyre, CM Punk, Cody Rhodes, Dolph Ziggler, Sheamus and Wade Barrett are the future of WWE – they are all total packages, both in the ring and on the mic.

+ Kane’s gimmick; as you’ve probably noticed, every promo the resurrected Kane has given so far has been given a correlating psychological analysis of human nature by me. Glenn Jacobs is a really intelligent person, and I am sure those correlations are no accident.

+ Brodus Clay’s character, when they don’t just waste time with it.

+ Big Show’s shuffle side kicks.

+ AJ, forever and always. This also leads nicely into:

- Matt “The Choice” Andrews. It’s a shame, really. I could like Matt… If only he’d leave AJ alone.

- Ted DiBiase’s theme. He’s face for God’s sake!

- Stereotypical foreigner gimmicks. They are distasteful and dated.

- The way announcing currently is in the WWE. That means random jabs at Cole and Booker T are implied when not said outright (but this is not limited to Cole and Booker – it’s the whole way announcing is handled. For example, King’s treatment of the divas is borderline sexual harassment – and he’s a face!).

- Aksana’s cliché role that doesn’t seem to be really going anywhere.

- “The Royal Rumble winner gets to main event Wrestlemania” is a fallacy, and has been this way for several years now. For the past 5 or so years (6 if we include this year – as no matter who is champion, Sheamus will NOT main event Wrestlemania, but Rock vs. Cena will), the winner of the Rumble has rarely actually main evented ‘Mania. See the Jan 21st Rundown for a detailed look at the how many winners in the past seven years main evented ‘Mania (hint: 1).

- the way Divas are handled. Unless I state otherwise for a particular week know that I am very much displeased with the Divas’ division in the WWE.

- The Great Khali. ’nuff said

NEW – And I hate this being a constant… 3rd week in a row – your US champion doesn’t even appear on TV! Actually, that has been the case ever since he won the title. If you don’t have confidence in the guy, don’t give him the title!

? Drew McIntyre’s storyline. This will likely change very soon when/if we see where it goes.

And with that out of the way, let’s get to this week’s Posits!

As I like to test out the format before I hit a sweet spot, this week RAW and Smackdown will be divided:

RAW

+ Punk is always great – even in a debate format. Actually – everyone was very much on queue in that segment. Well done (But the concept itself is still horrendous)

+ Here’s what I love about Jericho – he doesn’t shy away from putting someone over, and his match with Kofi proved that you can look strong in defeat. There was no option except for Jericho going over, but the offense Kofi got in made the match even, and better. All solidified main eventers should take a pointer from Jericho’s way of putting talent over.

+ Orton and Big Show are two of the greatest wrestlers of their respective generation, and for a reason. Their match was off the chart – it made sense, was engaging and had a good flow to it with enough amazing spots for the time it was given. Everyone in the back, take notice.

+ Triple H and Shawn Michaels’ segment was absolutely brilliant. Undertaker cutting his hair was made to look like it had some deep meaning to it – when actually he just cut his hair and they needed to incorporate it into the storyline. Nice way to do it – without explaining. Sometimes WWE should keep their fans guessing if they have reasoning behind their actions and not give an explanation that proves they don’t (That does not apply, however, to year-long storylines about computers).

+ Tamina vs. Beth, if given time (which, considering the amount of matches on the card, it probably will) will finally be the rectification the divas’ division needs and deserves.

+ Great wrestling all throughout RAW – I don’t think there was a single below average match, with the vast majority being great. Definite improvement over last week’s show

Smackdown

+ The Tag Team Champions’ match was awesome! It was given a decent length of time, and the finish was a great swerve. If only teams such as these two would be allowed TV time, you won’t need to do much to have a prominent tag team division.

+ Bryan blaming Orton and Show of cowardice was brilliant! THIS is what his character should be about – this hypocritical condescending façade (I can Jericho from time to time) should be the main focus of his character; not him being a Vegan. That whole promo before his match with Sheamus was great. The match itself was also great, and the finish went really well with Bryan’s character (if only the cameras had picked up on him spitting in Sheamus’ face. – I would not be surprised if that was the planned finish for his match with Orton.

+ Santino won the Battle Royal the same way he lost the Royal Rumble last year, and it was a nice way to have him win. Though what was up with Otunga’s leg?!

Now – no more Mr. Nice Guy (Landau). It’s time fore the Negs!

RAW

- Why did RAW start with a video chronicling the whole of Kane’s promo from last week? It was good, but hardly the focal point of the show. Also – the whole concept of an ambulance match is absolutely stupid – no matter what you do to push it, it remains a bad concept. Polished crap is crap nonetheless. Let’s just say there is a reason the match hasn’t been done in over a decade, and it isn’t its brutality.

- Raw’s Elimination Chamber… Debate? Really? I am on my school’s debate team (*gasp*) – and well, let’s just say there is a reason debates in wrestling are rare. However, they SHOULD be nonexistent. Ziggler was right. It was a fun segment, but the concept behind it made it much less enjoyable than it could have otherwise been.

- Is anyone else sick of seeing Ryder getting injured? Also, Ryder slapping Cena pushed him over the edge? THAT did it, his best friend slapping him – and rightfully so – got to him more than Kane continuously injuring said friend?

- Every champion should be featured every week, on every show applicable. Swagger not being on RAW and the Colons being featured only sporadically (with the announcers taking more time to put their manager over than putting them over) is not going to do their respective titles any favors.

Smackdown!

- I’ll just get this off my chest before anything else: You don’t put Drew McIntyre in the final 4 only to lose to SANTINO! Putting Drew in that match makes so much sense! Why, WWE?! WHY?! I understand that they want 3 faces and 3 heels in the match, but remember that that wasn’t the original plan going into it – unless they intended to turn Henry face before the Chamber. However – unless McIntyre takes Santino out and interjects himself into the chamber on Sunday (which I am all for) – Santino is NOT Chamber material.

- Why would you ever expose Khali like they did in his tag match with Big Show?! If you put him in a tag match, he should be on the apron most of the time and the hot tag will be made to him. NOT the other way around.

- Security isn’t going to get anywhere near Big Show? Fire them, then. If bodyguards will take bullets for people because that is their job, security will try to escort Show out, BECAUSE IT’S THEIR JOB!

- If DiBiase injured his WRIST, why on earth would you work his shoulder and elbow like Hunico and Camacho did? Wrist =/= whole arm, it made no sense. Also, please give these two more time in the ring, they are both great and deserve longer matches.

- “You “Gradurated” from Harvard Law school. That makes you smart, and it also makes you an attorney” is perhaps THE stupidest sentence I have ever heard spoken. EVER.

And all that’s left is the Queschies:

? Oddly enough, The Colonz vs. The Uso Boyz had the face & heel corners reversed for some reason.

? Where has Brodus Clay gone?!
? So on Smackdown you have to win – essentially – a Royal Rumble, to get the chance to get the chance (the doubling isn’t a typo) to “main event” WrestleMania?
? Mahal vs. Ezekiel Jackson, and here’s why: On one hand, there was a lot of mistiming in that match; On the other hand, it made the match feel organic. Regardless, the Camel Clutch as a finisher is very underwhelming – especially since Mahal doesn’t make it seem like a finisher. You got the feeling when Zeke tapped that he didn’t really need to tap out – and so did the announcers.

? The Divas’ Tag Team match was GREAT! So WHY did they have to ruin it with the gas gimmick?!
? WWE presents: As the angles turn – a new telenovela for the WWE network starring John Cena, Zack Ryder, and Eve. In an even less serious note – Ryder got friendzoned?! Are you serious Bro?! I do not know what to make of this whole thing yet.

? Santino winning the battle Royal is a we’ll-see-where-it-goes sort of deal. I hope he doesn’t make it into the Chamber and is instead taken out before entering by someone who will take his spot.

?I was very frustrated at first with Cole’s hypocrisy towards Bryan, until it was revealed that it was just that – hypocrisy. It actually became amusing when Cole started bashing Bryan the moment he got in the ring. I still do not know where they intend to take the whole thing, but I hope Cole won’t turn around and like Bryan, or if he does at least make it VERY gradual (as seen on Smackdown, they seem to be going in the direction of the latter – which I am willing to accept if it isn’t made out to be too quick and too drastic of a change)

It seems this week was everything last week wasn’t. It had great wrestling all throughout it with very little questionable booking (and whatever bad booking was present was trumped by the talent performing) – except for the obvious no-Swaggery. I’d say Santino winning is also questionable, but we have yet to see where they intend to take this whole thing. At the end of the day, everything turned out great this week, and I am excited for Elimination Chamber. Show, Orton, HHH and HBK showed us how wrestling SHOULD be done – both in the ring and out

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  • MPXTheChoice

    Guy – How do you know that Bryan spit in Sheamus' face? I mean, it's a logical conclusion…I don't remember hearing the announcers say anything about it…

    Also, I definitely wrote my blog before I read yours…and I chuckled because we touched on all the same points. I completely agree with you about the debate part – everyone did an awesome job…but the idea and segment itself was a lesson in the art of booking awkward moments. "Hey guys…let's all stand behind podiums in the ring…and cut promos…" The last segment like this that I remember was for last year's Raw Money in the Bank PPV match. Everyone was in the ring and there were just all sorts of "Oh yeah? Well YOUR MOM" type moments.

    • MPXTheChoice

      I'll add to your Posits with this:
      +Just before Drew got eliminated, he did something big to someone (shows how interested I was in the match) and then looked right at hard camera and said something along the lines of "YOU SEE TEDDY LONG? THAT'S HOW IT'S DONE!" …I'm paraphrasing. Clearly.

      And I'll add to your Negs:
      - No AJ. The fact that you didn't bring this up clearly shows that you do not care about her one iota…I noticed though. I NOTICED.
      - The fact that WWE spoiled the battle royal three days before it 'happened.' Read my blog for more on this topic.

      I look forward to reading your comments on my blog, sir.

  • Guy Landau

    I remember wanting to write it up, planning to and basically starting to, but then… I don't know how I didn't write it. Honest to God I wanted to neg her absence. Besides, you already have a girlfriend. Leave something for the pennyless, you capitalistic bastard!