RAW Results November 25, 2013
From Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum in Uniondale, New York
Reported on by Kendra Bunyon For Wrestling News World
Michael Strahan is on RAW! And who is The face of the WWE? We will find out on RAW!
Maurice ‘Mad Dog” Vachon 1929-2013
In Ring Segment
Orton out to the ring. Cole, King and JBL argue about there being no physical interference, but that The Authority distracted Big Show which gave Orton the win.
Orton – I think that I’m owed an apology. I’m an owed an apology by the doubters, the WWE ‘Universe’, those who thought he wouldn’t show up today as WWE Champ. The Authority said they’d join me ringside, so please welcome Stephanie McMahon and Triple H.
Steph and Trip come out in their power suits. This week Steph’s suit jacket is much more figure flattering than usual.
Trip – Congratulations Randy, we couldn’t be any more pleased. When I hand picked you to be the future of this company ten years ago, I knew you have the potential to be one of the greatest Superstars in the WWE.
Steph – Last week we gave you the motivation, planted the seeds of doubt, and did what we knew you’d do ask Champ. You reached deep down inside and rose above and were victorious. It’s always nice when we’re proven right.
Orton – There you go, and you’ve somehow made this all about yourselves. I didn’t need your help last night, yet when I was on the verge of an untainted win, you came to ringside. I didn’t need your help to prove I’m The face of the WWE.
“Daniel Bryan! Daniel Bryan!” chants.
Trip – Randy, we said there’d be no physical interference, and there was no physical interference.
“Daniel Bryan!” chants.
Trip – Now, you might have had a hard time remembering this as you were unconscious at the time, but we came down because it looked like there was going to be a new WWE Champion at the time.
“YES!” “YES!” “YES!”
Orton – I don’t need you protection I can take care of myself! (to the fans) SHUT UP! I can take care of myself!
“YES!” “YES!” “YES!”
Orton – I took everything Big Show had to dish out, unlike someone else I know (looking right at Trip), and I stood back up and got the job done. I slayed the giant. I slayed the giant because I’m The face of the WWE! I’m the WWE Champion. I’m the greatest Superstar in the 50 years that this company has been around. The greatest star in the WWE, ever! Nobody can take that away from me. Not you (Trip). Not you (Steph). Not any one of you people can take that from me. Nobody can!
Cena’s music hits and out he comes slowly, not stopping, but saluting on his way down the ramp. Cena into the ring with a big smile to the mixed reaction.
Cena – How you doin’, John Cena, WHC. (Cena extends his hand) Oh yeah, I forgot, you’re Randy Orton, the guy slayed a giant, and the guy standing here looking like a giant piece of…
Steph – John! Whoa, I’m not my father, I don’t want to see you spontaneously combust, but that being said, I don’t want to waste time, so what exactly do you want?
Cena – I want you for a second to listen to these folks. You wanna know why they chant for Bryan, why the chant “YES!”, they’re sick of the administrative BS!
“YES!” “YES!” “YES!”
Cena – Looks like I struck a cord. They’re sick of guys like you feeling entitled, being coddled, protected, being confused little boys. But you asked one question I found interesting, “Who is Champion?” Because the way I look at it right now, there’s two Champions in this very ring. I say we cut the administrative BS and find and answer to that question, because I think it’s time there should be only one.
Orton – You’re not going to seriously consider listening to this!
Cena – Enough! Enough! This is not between them. This is Champion to Champion. This is between you and me. This is man to man. You got the guts? Will you do it? This is a match 11 years in the making. It’s not even up to you. I challenge you in front of this audience. In front of the world! Randy Orton vs John Cena for the WHC and the WWE Championship!
“YES!” “YES!” “YES!”
Steph – Normally I hate it when they do that (fans chanting “YES!”) but we have been talking about this for a while now.
Orton – Wait a minute! When I walked in you were planning it? You’ve been plotting this all along? So what I thought was going on, really is going on.
Trip – Randy, grow up. Alright, a minute ago you were going off about how confident you are, now you’re crying about it? Tell you what we’re going to do. We’re going to do something epic. In three weeks (huge letdown groan from the crowd), at Tables, Ladders & Chairs (heat) we’re going to hang the WHC above this ring. And hang the WWE Championship above this ring, and we’re going to make history. We’re going to do something epic. Orton vs Cena in a TLC Match!
Both men, facing each other, raise their belts high in the air. Cena smirks, Orton looks quite pissed. Orton leaves the ring rubbing his head, then stops and looks back at Cena who raises his strap high in the air.
The Shield faces Cody, Goldust and Rey, next!
The Shield vs Cody & Goldust & Rey
The Shield to the ring. Goldust and Cody to the ring together. Rey in to join his team.
Goldust stares down Reigns, then the other two rushed Rey and Cody. This gave Reigns the distraction to bring Goldust to the heel corner. He worked over Goldust, then Ambrose in on Goldust. Rollins tags in and stomps Goldust. Ambrose tags back in and rakes Goldust’s gace on the second rope. Goldust catches Ambrose and launches him over, but Ambrose caught himself. Upper cut on Ambrose. Rollins tags in and stops Goldust, then Goldust launches Rollins from the ring. Rollins flies in and takes an inverted atomic drop. Before Goldust can get to his corner, Reigns tags in and clotheslines Goldust.
Goldust with blows on Ambrose, but Ambrose stops Goldust and tags out. Reigns in and they try to double team Goldust, instead a double DDT! Rollins tags in with a cheap shot on Cody, but Goldust tags out and Rey all over Rollins. Rey with a seated senton, then looks caught, but hits head scissors. Rollins free of the 619 and slams Rey to the mat. Cody tags in with a missile drop kick on Ambrose, then takes Ambrose down for a long two. Ambrose telegraphs and eats Cody’s hitting his brother’s upper cut. Alabama slam for two. Everyone in and working around, then Rey takes the spear, and Goldust takes the spear. Cody stops Reigns, hits his disaster kick. Cody grabs Rollins for cross Rhodes, but then Ambrose, who is legal, takes Cody down for three.
Winners – The Shield (8:31)
Video recap of Reigns’ spears on Rey and Goldust, then Ambrose plants Cody for three. The Shield poses in the ring.
Ziggler vs Sandow – Choose the match…
Strong Island Street Fight
Long Island Lumberjack Match
Hamptons Hardcore Match
Miz is in the ring, his set ready.
Miz – Welcome to the most must-see TV show in history, welcome to Miz TV! Tonight my guest is a 7 time ProBowler, a Superbowl Champion, named one of 100 NFL players of all time, he’s one of New York’s most loved athletes and TV personalities, you can watch him on every weekday morning on Live with Kelly & Michael. Please welcome Mr. Michael Strahan!
Out comes Titus O’Neil in a very sexy suit and a blackened gap in his teeth.
Miz – Michael, you never looked so good.
O’Neil (with a huge lisp) – Let me start of by saying how great it is to be here in New York on Monday night RAW. And with former WWE Champion, and former WrestleMania main eventer.
Miz – It’s a slight honor standing next to the 2001 Defensive Player of the Year, but with all you accolades and your job as a Fox NFL analyst, and all the things you do, and your sidekick with Kelly Ripa, I have a question, and I know it’s on everyone’s mind, what’s with the gap? Why don’t you hawk that ring and fix those things?
O’Neil – That gap is distinctive. It show life, especially when I smile.
Miz – That gap is wider that The Giants and the Playoffs. (huge heat) Oh, Miz is a bad guy, it was a joke!
O’Neil – Let’s switch gears real fast, and I’d like to get out of here tonight. There’s a lot of great Superstars in the back. But one man in particular, I think this one man has everything, size, speed, agility, personality. Not talking about Reigns or Big Show, I’m talking about Titus O’Neil! (heat and barking)
Michael Strahan comes out, points to his gap and heads for the ring slapping hands on both sides and getting a lot of love. He’s pumped up and gets in the ring. Strahan and O’Neil shake hands and chest bump each other. Miz hands Strahan a mic.
Strahan – What’s up Long Island, New York? I gotta say thank you to Titus and Miz, you guys were great, but your jokes, weak! The backup towel boy has better jokes than that!
Miz – Really?
Strahan – Really.
Miz – Really?
Strahan – And I like you Titus, your suit game is nice, brother, but you gap game is weak, brother. You gonna wear the gap, you don’t have the confidence. The WWE, that’s what it’s about, it’s about fun. You ready to have fun tonight. I want to welcome you to Monday night RAW! I want to thank you for letting me be Special Guest Host. On good authority man, on very good authority, tonight we’re going to have a tag team main event. In one corner will have Randy Orton and his partner ADR (heat). Oh, you don’t like them? Okay. How about this, in the other corner, we have someone who can play the entire right side of the offensive line. 7 foot, 440 pound Big Show. And his partner, WHC John Cena. What do you know about that man? What do you know about that?
Miz (shakes Strahan’s hand) – There’s no doubt that you’re a great host, but I’m a host and a WWE Superstar who performs in this ring each week. Michael Strahan, think you can hack it in a WWE ring?
Strahan – Can I hack it against a guy like you? I think Kelly Ripa’s tougher than you.
Miz – I don’t think you understand, I’m the most must-see WWE Superstar of all time! I’m not sitting, drinking coffee with Kelly every morning. Maybe ten years ago…
Strahan – Don’t let the suit fool you, there’s a bad man under here!
Miz – Dude, you were cool 15 years ago!
O’Neil – Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-hold, hold, hold!
Strahan – You better help your boy out!
O’Neil – Listen. I understand, you’re a great athlete and this is not football. If Miz gives you a simple move, you may not make it to Kelly tomorrow.
Strahan – He’s going to give me a simple move to keep me from working with Kelly Ripa tomorrow?
Miz – One simple move, what about a hip toss, Michael. Think you can handle a simple hip toss?
Strahan – Y’all think I can handle a simple hip toss? (pop) Okay, let’s try a simple hip toss.
O’Neil – For insurance purposes, let me move this stuff out of the way.
Strahan – I’m going to hold my mic while we do it.
Miz – You really want to hold your mic while you do it?
O’Neil – Kelly, I’m available if he doesn’t make it through this tomorrow.
Strahan leads in, Miz tries to hit the move and Strahan doesn’t budge.
Strahan – That was it?
Miz – Man, he was stiff!
O’Neil removes his jacket as fans bark.
Strahan – Take off that jacket big man! Take off that jacket and let’s see what you got. I’m loose!
Miz – You think O’Neil is going to toss him, or do you cheer Strahan? (pop)
Strahan – Me and you Titus, you ready?
O’Neil is ready, but Strahan blocks him.
Miz – We understand you’re afraid to take a hip toss, but here’s what you do. Pretend I’m Tony Romo throwing TD passes all over the blue and red.
O’Neil – I don’t think you want to say that in New York.
Strahan – That’s okay, because 9 times out of 10, it is pretend. I ain’t worry about that, let’s go.
O’Neil – Let the crowd get hyped for this!
Strahan rushes Miz, blocks him, and hits his own hip toss that he’s obviously practiced quite a bit with Miz.
Strahan – Oh year, oh yeah, it’s real!
O’Neil – Look, that’s what I’m talking about!
O’Neil sets up and they dance together chanting, “Millions of dollars”, but then Strahan hits a hip toss on O’Neil! Miz points and laugh.
Strahan – Yeah, that felt good. If you’d had your gap right, I wouldn’t have had to do that!
Miz – Michael Strahan everybody!
The three laugh, dance and have a fun time together. Strahan gets the fans even more riled up! JBL goes on to mention what Family Guy “did to that dog!”
Big E defeated Axel for the IC Title last week on RAW.
Axel & Ryback vs Big E &
Axel and Ryback in the ring waiting. Big E out to in a cloud of chalk, then Henry comes out and they head to the ring together.
Axel ducks Big E, chops him, but then Big E reverses a whip and shoulder blocks Axel in the gut. Back breaker on Axel, then Ryback with the blind tag and Axel still on Big E. spinebuster from Ryback, then a splash for two. Ryback raises Big E and drops him for two through large “Goldberg!”chants. Axel tags in with blows. Ryback tags in and a headlock on Big E that only really squishes his face. Big E up, punches free, then a belly-to-belly. Henry yelling to come in. Henry tags in and works over Axel who tags in. Clotheslines, then on his knees to head butt Axel, a tribute to JYD. Running power slam. Big E in to clothesline Ryback out. WSS on Axel for three.
Winners – Big E & Henry (2:33)
Big E is about glowing as he poses with Henry after their win. Between his strap and Henry he looked giddy! Video recap of the win.
Recap of the opening segment between Cena and Orton, The Authority deciding on how to unify.
7 On 7 – True Divas vs Total Divas
Aksana on Brie. Aksana hides in the ropes and screams, but Brie won’t take that. Side Russian legs sweep for one, and won’t let Aksana tag out. Brie slams Aksana face down for three. Aksana eliminated.
Rosa in and Nikki takes her down. Rosa eliminated.
Cameron tags in, and Tamina in. Naomi tags in and they double suplex Tamina. Double splits on Tamina, but Tamina kicks out. Naomi and Tamina botch a buster, then Naomi eliminated.
Cameron in, Tamina rolls through. Tamina with a Saomoan drop, and Cameron eliminated.
Nattie in and rolls up Tamina. Tamina with a clothesline on Nattie. Tamina stomps Nattie in a corner when JBL says it was more of a club to Nattie’s head. Big clothesline from Nattie, then a suplex. JoJo tags in and rolls up Tamina. Tamina eliminated.
Fox in and taken down for two, then another two. Back breaker on JoJo who is eliminated.
Eva Marie in to HUGE heat! Eva Marie rolls Fox up. Fox eliminated.
Kaitlyn and Nattie in, clothesline to Nattie for two. Kaitlyn telegraphs, is kicked. Kaitlyn kicks back. Nattie up, but free. Nattie jumps over Kaitlyn, but then locks on the sharpshooter. Kaitlyn eliminated.
AJ in and jumps on Nattie with blows. “YES!” “YES!” “YES!” from the fans as AJ slammed down. Nattie rolls through, but AJ fights back and pins Nattie. Nattie eliminated.
Brie with a drop kick to AJ’s back that doesn’t touch her, but she sells. AJ slammed to the mat face first for three. AJ eliminated
Summer Rae is alone, and scared! Summer Rae snaps, then dances in the ring, and Nikki does the worm. Summer Rae says she can do it, then flops around in the mat, cries and tries to leve, but Eva Marie stop her. To the other side, but Brie stops her. “Twerk!” chants for Summer Rae. Brie stops Summer Rae again. Nikki gets Summer Rae in the rack, hits a couple squats, then slams her for three!
Winners – Total Divas (8:19)
Eva Marie and Bellas dance. Nikki does the worm, then Brie does the worm! Scotty 2 Hotty gets a couple of mentions, as he did last night at Survivor Series.
Sandow vs Ziggler
Sandow in the ring with King. King announces what match Sandow will be in with Ziggler. Sandow takes the mic from King.
Sandow – Let me publicly state this. I am above this! I should not be forced to compete in a match under circus-like conditions at the whim of all of you slack-jawed half-wits! You’re welcome!
King – That being said, let’s find out the results of the vote. What kind of match will Sandow compete with Ziggler in?
Stong Island Street Fight 32%
Long Island Lumberjack Match 31%
Hamptons Hardcore Match 37%
Ziggler out in an Islanders jersey.
Sandow rushes Ziggler with a gold club, but is taken down with a drop kick. Sandow on Ziggler and removes his jersey to HUGE and growing heat. Sandow stands on Ziggler and sends him from the ring. Ziggler into a post in what JBL calls, a blond hurt. Ziggler into a trash can, head first, outside, unprotected (possibly, hard to see). Sandow into the barricade, then clotheslined into the timekeeper area. Sandow dives over the barricade onto Ziggler.
Cole brings up the AE and Mean Street Posse! JBL rips him a new one for this. Sandow off the top of the barricade on Ziggler. Ziggler comes back slamming the semi-crushed trash can on Sandow’s head.
Sandow chokes Ziggler in the ring, under the ropes, with a foot. “You’re welcome!” yells Sandow. Sandow stomps Ziggler’s head, then dumps out a garbage can and goes after Ziggler with it, but Sandow lands face first in the garbage! B Ziggler gets a row boat oar, but Sandow on Ziggler with knees. Sandow slams Ziggler to the mat, then grabs the Islanders jersey, puts it over Ziggler, then hits his elbow of disdain. “You’re welcome!”
Ziggler rolls out, head under the ring. Sndgrabs Ziggler’s foot and pulls. Ziggler sprays, badly, Sandow with the extinguisher. Ziggler yells, lands on Sandow in the corner and hits all ten blows, followed by a neck breaker on Sandow. Ziggler back to the oar, swings it badly on Sandow, then hits his famouser for a long two.
Sandow out, Ziggler follows. Sandow slams the can into Ziggler. “Randy Savage!” chants! Ziggler into the stairs, then rolled into the ring. Blows on Ziggler on the mat. Sandow with a tennis racket, but Ziggler with a DDT on a chair for a long two.
Both are slow to get up. Ziggler rushes, Sandow side steps and Ziggler eats corner. A canoe paddle – not to be confused with the row boat paddle that’s much thicker – broken over Ziggler’s back. Ziggler slammed back first into a trash can for three.
Winner – Sandow (11:35)
Video of the end of the match.
Promo for Miz’s new movie on ABC Family that will debut tomorrow night. Francia Raisa is in the front row, and yelling that their movie is on at 7PM ET tomorrow night.
Seth and Santino laughing and joking. Santino backs off and Rowan is there, mask on. Rowan hands Strahan a mask. “YES!” “YES!” “YES!” from the fans, so Strahan puts it on. They stare at each other a bit, then Rowan leaves.
Santino – Is it gone? I don’t know what it is. It’s now Halloween, so it must have something to do with Thanksgiving. Take another one, give it to Kelly, tell her to put it on the turkey, put it in the oven for 5 hours at 450* Take out the turkey, throw it away, because at this point it’s going to be burnt to a crisp and you can nibble on the mask.
Santino backs away and Strahan stands there looking confused, then directly into the camera, and sells it beautifully.
In Ring Segment
Renee Young welcomes Punk to the ring. Punk out in his ring gear and a black hoodie. “It’s clobberin’ time!” He slaps hands and poses for the fans. He runs around in the ring calling for more pop. Renee is about to speak, but Punk puts a hand over her mic to hear the “CM Punk!” chants. Renee then announces Punk’s partner, Daniel Bryan. Bryan out to “YES!” “YES!” “YES!”, he also has a mic in his hand.
Renee – Congratulations on your match last night. I want to get your reactions to that, and to your match tonight against The Wyatt Family.
Punk – Did we survive at Survivor Series against Rowan and Harper?
Bryan – “YES!”
Punk – And tonight, is the deck stacked against us because not only do we take on Rowan and Harper, but also Bray Wyatt, the entire The Wyatt Family?
Bryan – “YES!”
Punk – But is the silver lining in that is that we finally get our hands on Bray Wyatt in this very ring?
Bryan – “YES!”
Punk – Is Bray Wyatt a false prophet?
Bryan – “YES!”
Punk – Are we in Long Island?
Bryan – “YES!”
Punk – Are we ready for a fight?
Bryan – “YES!”
Punk – Is is completely weird that we all have our own mics and Renee is not asking us any questions?
Bryan – “YES!”
Punk – What’s a better tag team name, The Goats – The Greatest of All Teams, or The Beard (Bryan is about to yell “YES!”) and The Best?
Bryan – “YES!” Wait, wait, that’s not a “YES!” or “NO!” question.
Punk – Well let me tell you something, brother, against the entire The Wyatt Family, and normal people would be quakin’ in their boots, but what you and I do is beat the odds. Handicap Matches seem to be all the rage around here, and if you ask me, personally, I think that’s The Authority’s way of fixin’ a problem. Oh, we have a problem, just stick them in a Handicap Match. Good thinking Trip, real creative! It doesn’t matter, does it? (Bryan shakes his head.) The Beard and The Best. You can put anyone in this ring, the entire The Wyatt Family, you can put Renee on their side (she wrinkles her nose at this), The Dicks, The Bushwackers, IRS, all of the Russians, The Rock & Roll Express, The Midnight Express, The Ring Crew Express. I don’t care if you put Marty DeRosa, Matt Classic, Colt Cabana, Scott (?). It doesn’t matter how many bodies in this ring, or how many obstacles you put in front of Daniel Bryan and CM Punk, because we’re going to burn them all to the ground babay!
“YES!” “YES!” “YES!”
Bryan – And I have looked into the soulless eyes of Bray Wyatt, and it is very, very clear that he is not finished playing whatever sick and twisted games he’s playing, and he’s not going to stop until he’s finished us. But we will not let that happen, and there’s only one question left. Punk, what time is it?
Punk – It’s clobberin’ time!
Bryan – “YES!”
The Wyatt Family’s entrance
Handicap Match – Bryan & Punk vs The Wyatt Family
Harper removes Rowan’s mask and he heads for Punk. They circle at bit, trying to get hands and feet to the other. Punk is tossed down and the arena fills with chants for him. Punk on Rowan who backs Punk into a corner and chops him hard. Punk up, then free. Kicks on Rowan’s leg, then Bryan in to “YES!” “YES!” “YES!” Bryan eats a back elbow to “NO!” “NO!” “NO!” Blows on Bryan in the heel corner. Harper tags in and on Bryan. Bryan whipped, flips over, then clotheslines Harper the mat. Punk tags in with a head lock on Harper. Harper puts a finger in Punk’s eye to gain control. Punk whipped, gets a foot up, then a shoulder into Harper’s gut in the face corner. Bryan tags in, takes Harper down by one leg. Upper cuts on Harper, but then Bryan is slammed down. Bray tags in and chops Bryan as Harper holds him. Bray kicks at Bryan, yells smack in his face, then head butts Bryan. Another head butt on the mat. Rowan tags in and stomps Bryan as Bray holds him. Big scoop slam on Bryan! Bryan pulled to his feet by his beard, then head butted. Bryan whipped, moves, avoids a kick and Rowan hung up top. Punk tags in.
Punk under and over Rowan, then a back kick on Rowan. Running knee on the ropes rather than the corner. Rowan falls out, Punk flies out onto Rowan. Punk stands on the barricade and poses for the fans. Rowan rolled in, swinging neck breaker on Rowan, then Punk climbs. Punk smiles, then hits his Savage elbow for two.
“It’s nap time!” Harper distracts and Punk knocks him and Bray off, but turns his back on Rowan and Punk get tossed from the ring.
Facelock on Punk on the mat. Punk elbows free,but a forearm to the back drops him. Bray tags in and head butts on Punk. Dueling cants of “Daniel Bryan!” and “CM Punk!” Scoop slam on Punk for two as Bryan is screaming and freaking to get into the match. Harper tags in with the gator roll. Punk tries to punch back, but Harper on his face, then an upper cut.
Rowan tags in and a bear hug on Punk, flinging him around. Bryan gets he “CM Punk!” chants going. Punk climbs down Rowan’s back, then free and kicks Rowan in the head! Harper and Bryan tag in. Running drop kick on Bray from the corner. Bryan on Harper, then flies out onto Bray! Missile drop kick on Harper. “YES!” kicks on Harper, but then Harper stops him. Bryan muscles Harper down, but Rowan breaks the hold. Drop toe hold on Rowan, and Bryan back and forth between opposite corners on Rowan and Harper with drop kicks, but then Bryan is caught by Harper and slammed. Harper pins, but Punk breaks the count. All five in the match and the ref can’t break up the fight, so he calls for the bell. The fans boo the ref for stopping the match.
No Contest (13:37)
Bryan dragged outside Bryan Bray and Rowan. The camera doesn’t catch it, but Cole says it’s a wicked clothesline that takes Punk down, it’s by Harper. Rowan puts Bryan over his shoulder and the three of them leave with Bryan. Punk, in shock, leaves the ring, trying to stagger after Bryan and The Wyatt Family, but suddenly he’s speared from the side! It’s Reigns! Rollins and Ambrose roll Punk into the ring. Reigns is there, they set up and triple power bomb Punk in the center of the ring.
Punk is barely moving as they go to video of Reigns spearing Punk, then The Shield bombing Punk in the ring. Punk is still barely moving as The Shield leaves the ring and heads up the ramp. They stop near the top of the ramp. Reigns calls to Ambrose who is off the side. He comes up and the three pose, then stare back at Punk writhing on the mat and smirk.
Recap of the pounding and plundering taken by Bryan and pnkn by The Wyatt Family and The Shield.
Miz is stretching out watching his new movie.
Francia – Are you seriously watching yourself right now?
Miz – Yes. Right now and tomorrow.
Francia – I hear you got a match coming up. You ready? Think you can handle it?
Miz – About as well as I handled you in the movie.
Francia – Really?
Miz – Really!
Francia – Why don’t we let the WWE ‘Universe’ decide that tomorrow night.
Miz – Awesome.
Francia – Awesome. Good luck!
Miz – Thank you!
Kofi vs Miz
Kofi to the ring in blue. Video of Miz short arming Kofi’s tag last week on RAW. Tat cost Kofi the match. Miz out to face him. Video recap of Kofi and Miz during the Survivor Series Pre-show. Miz offered Kofi a handshake, but Kofi slapped him.
Kofi offers Miz a handshake. Miz extends a bit, then they both slap each other, but neither get much of it. They struggle around, side headlock on Kofi, then a takes down. Then on Miz with the same him. Hip toss on Kofi, then on Miz. Kofi laughs about the hip tossing earlier. Kofi hip tossed, lands on his feet. They both stop and laugh. Kofi behind Miz, Miz reverses, Kofi reverses. Miz takes Kofi ovcer his shoulder. Kofi with a drop kick to Miz’s face. Miz sent out. Kofi about to fly out, but puts on the brakes on the top rope. Front facelock on Miz. Miz up, backs Kofi into a corner. Kofi whipped, tries to float over, is caught and kicked in the guts. Kofi pinned for two.
Chinlock on Kofi on the mat. Kofi elbow drops. This Friday is King’s birthday, also Zeb’s and JBL’s! King same day, same year! Kofi with his double hand clotheslines, then takes Miz down for the boom drop. Kofi is pumped up, but sadly the fans don’t seem to care much. Kofi sets up, but Miz catches, Kofi reverses. Kofi with his SOS for two.
Kofi back into a corner, turns and kicks Miz in the head. Kofi up with a horrible cross body for two, but then Miz grabs Kofi and rolls him up for three.
Winner – Miz (5:03)
Foley is pushing wweshop.com! He’s Foley, then Dude Love, then Mankind, onto Cactus Jack who wants everything on the table, except the Ryback doll, because he can’t picture himself snuggling with it! Have a nice day!
King – We have a very special guest with us, Charlie Tebele was winner of Superstars for Sandy Auction. He loves the WWE and even has his own name if he was a Superstars, what is it?
Charlie – The Kosher Butcher. Jerry, we have a gift for you tonight.
Charlie’s son give King a ‘The Kosher Butcher’ t-shirt.
King – If you were in that ring, what would your finishing move be?
Charlie (as his son turns the shirt to show the back) – The Circumcision.
King – Charlie, I’m afraid I’m going to have to cut you off right here.
Slater vs Woods
R-Truth – Let’s do this the right way, Long Island, New York, make some noise! What’s up? My man Brodus Clay and I, we got together and had a little talky-talk, came up with a little sumthin-sumthin, a way to give a brother a chance. Tonight, courtesy of Clay and the Dactyls, give you Xavier Woods!
Dactyls out, then Xavier comes out to dance on stage with them, then head to the ring together. The girls split on the apron and he dives through them. Dactyls into the ring and all three dance together. Corner pryo as well. 3MB is not at all impressed outside the ring.
Slater behind Woods. Woods with an arm bar, Slater reverses it. Woods rolls around on the mat a bit to reverses it and make it look interesting, but then Slater on him with blows. Woods whipped, floats over, hits head scissors, then a sick chop! Woods whipped, caught trying to float, then eats the top of a corner. Slater stomps Woods on the mat, then yells, “3MB!”
Chinlock on Woods on the mat as R-Truth gets the fans behind Woods. Woods into a drop kick and is taken down for two. Woods told announce that he was born in a barrel of butcher knives, and grew up in a forest of fire, but JBL didn’t like that and argued it the whole way. Woods fights back with blows and a head butt. A big right then serious drop kick lands Slater in a corner. Woods with his finishing combination for three.
Winner – Xavier Woods (3:17)
Woods over the The Kosher Butcher to get a shirt from him, then back to the ring to celebrate.
Talking all about Saturday Night’s Main Event, it’s on the 50 years of WWE.
Bellas are getting autographs by Strahan. Cameron and Naomi comes up for autographs as well. Then Eva Marie comes up and talks about her own TV show. “I just wanted you to meet me,” she says before leaving. Strahan the turns to find Goldust there. They stare, then Goldust huffs at Strahan, then leaves. Strahan wipes spittle off his face.
Cena and Strahan talking about hip tosses. They talk about Strahan’ show earlier and letting Strahan win.
Orton & ADR vs Cena & Big Show
Orton to the ring. ADR out to tag with him. Big Show runs to the ring, Orton flees. The camera is close in on Orton and you can see the huge bruises on his chest from Big Show’s chops last night at Survivor Series. Cena out to the stage, gets the fans cheering on each side, trying to get each side louder. He picked one side as his section, then said, “Now it’s time to go to work!” Cena slid his strap into the ring ahead of him, and the ref stopped it as the belt was going to slide right out the other side. The ref fumbled the belt picking it up. Cena reached for it, and they had a bit of tug-o-war over the belt until Cena took it away to pose with it. Dueling chants for Cena as he takes off his shirt and throws it to the fans.
ADR circles Big Show a bit, but then slammed back into a corner and takes big blows as well as a SICK chop to the chest. Big Show shushes the fans, then chops ADR. ADR kicks at Big Show and punches at him, but a shoulder block drops ADR. Again Big Show shushes, but ADR ducks. Dueling Cena chants and he’s not even in the ring. ADR flees and tagsout. Big Show smiles an on Orton with big punches in a corner. Shushing and a SICK chop. Orton drops to the bottom buckle to regroup. Another shush and another slap. Orton’s chest is now bright red and bruised. Head butt to Orton. Big Show slams Orton, then drop an elbow for two.
Orton holds his chest, but then Big Show chokes Orton on the second rope.
Cena on his knees, ADR tags in and kicks Cena. ADR talks smack to Big Show, then works over Cena’s left leg. Cena set up top, face out, then flipped back to hang and ADR grinds his forearm into Cena’s face. The last Undisputed Champion was Brock Lesnar in 2002. Jericho was the first, beating The Rock and SCSA in the same night. Orton tags in with upper cuts on Cena, then backs him into the heel corner with back elbows. ADR with a cheap attack on Cena. Orton pins for two.
Chinlock on Cena on the mat. Cena suplexes free of the hold. Orton tags out, ADR is lifted, but free and hits a DDT for a long two. ADR waves his hand in front of his face to mock Cena. Cena on the ropes, ADR rushes him, Cena moves and ADR flies out. Cena struggles, and makes it to Big Show. Big Show brings ADR in the hard way. Clotheslines to ADR, then a body drop where ADR looks off his mark. Big Show rushes ADR who moves so Big Show eats corner. Low drop kick on Big Show’s knee, then a sick kick to the head from ADR. Big Show looks lost, shaking his head, eyes blank. Big Show can’t get to his feet, selling it really well. Big Show falls onto his bum and ADR rakes his face.
Orton tags in and stomps Big Show’s head. Big Show kicks out. ADR in with another kick to the side of Big Show head as Orton holds his head. The ref checks on Big Show. Orton in on Big Show for two.
Chinlock on Big Show, the doctor is in and Orton made to leg go. The match is suspended while Big Show is evaluated. Big Show crawls, but can’t stand as the doctor checks on him. Big Show stares off into space, gets to his feet, says he’s fine, and Orton is on him with blows. Big Show grabs Orton, but Orton fights back with a DDT. Orton lines up for the punt, but Big Show comes back with a really wimpy spear, but enough to get to Cena.
Cena with shoulder blocks, but ADR with a kick to Cena’s head to block the 5 knuckle shuffle. The doctor still with Big Show outside as ADR set up, but Cena reverses into the STF. ADR has to tap out.
Winners – Cena & Big Show (15:59)
Cena directly over to ask the doctor about Big Show. ADR attacks Cena when his back is turned. ADR sets up again, but Cena reverses into the AA. Orton is in the ring and nails Cena in the side of the head with the WWE Championship belt. Orton out, grabs Cena’s belt as well. Orton steps up, stands over Cena, raises both belts high in the air. The doctor’s head can be seen popping up, then ducking down again behind Orton, still outside the ring with Big Show.
Everything Eva Marie
The Wyatt Family abducting Bryan
ADR announced for the main event