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Hello and good evening, my fellow wrestling dorks! Kevin Christopher Sullivan here. Tonight, I'll be offering live coverage and commentary (just like the headline says) of tonight's WWE Raw. But, it's not just any Raw. It's the final Raw of 2020. Which means that either WWE will end the year with a banger of an episode, or it'll be a disaster - which would be par for the course for 2020, amirite?!?!
Anyway, this will be latest update at the bottom and going upwards. I'll do my best to timestamp everything.
If you'd like to share your own comments on tonight's proceeding, well, we have the comments section down below for that. Please make liberal use of it. I wanna know what you guys are thinking (as opposed to Mick Jones of Foreigner, who wants to know what love is).
I'm also on Twitter - in fact, I'll be sharing numerous Tweets from both WWE sources as well as some of my favorite Tweeters that are part of this lovely community of wrestling fans and professionals we call... I dunno what we call it. Doesn't matter. If you want to have your tweets shared, tweet me at @HeyImKevinSully.
OK.... we're going to be kicking things off in (looks at imaginary watch) twenty minutes, so.... let's get ready...
Before we start, we'd like to once again offer our condolences to the friends, fans, and family of Jon Huber aka Brodie Lee aka Luke Harper, who passed away last week. He was an amazing talent and an even better person. We'll miss you, Brodie.
WWE also offers their condolences before the show starts, with an In Memorium card - which is actually very classy on their part.
Randy Orton will be the guest tonight on "Alexa's Playground". So, that should be a thing that happens.
(7:03pm) Also, here comes WWE Champion Drew McIntyre! And his sword!
(All timestamps are Central time.)
McIntyre opens up his promo with "It's Monday... you know what that means..."
Next week, Drew will be defending his WWE Championship against either Keith Lee or Drew's "best friend", Sheamus.
Sheamus and Drew are trying so hard not to start cracking up laughing during this exchange. It's really fun to watch.
Keith Lee is in the house and he doesn't trust Drew anymore after what Sheamus did to him last week. Lots of jaw-jackin' back and forth and the WWE champ suggest they get their match tonight started right now.
(7:14pm) Sheamus kicks Keith in the face before the match starts because that's what we're going with right now.
Drew is joining Tom, Byron, and Joe at the announce table.
Sheamus leaps from the top rope onto Keith Lee, who is on the arena floor, and knocks him into the announce table.
Sheamus is slapping Lee in the face - "Who do you think you are?!?" - which is not a wise thing to do.
Nope, it wasn't - Lee fights back and nails Sheamus with a Spirit Bomb and gets the win.
RESULT: Keith Lee defeats Sheamus
Elias is backstage with Jaxson Ryker, playing his gee-tar, and Ryker hears a noise. He's ready to do some punchin', but Elias tells him to chill out, maaaaaaaaan.
Meanwhile, The Miz is on his way to the ring to take on Gran Metalik. If you remember, Miz no longer has the Money In The Bank briefcase and, this may comes as a shock to some of you, but Miz is really, really not happy about that.
... is that Carlito?!
Miz is angry. Aaaaaangry. He's taking it out on Metalik. However, Metalik dodges a powerbomb attempt and rolls up Miz to get the win!
RESULT: Gran Metalik defeats The Miz
After the break, Dana Brooke is going one on one with... hold on... *checks notes*... oh no.
Baszler goes for the arm stomp on Brooke... you know the one... but Dana gets out of the way. So, Baszler instead grabs her arm, slides out of the ring, and slams it onto the ring apron. That's not very nice. :(
Shayna slaps the Karakuna Clutch on Dana outside of the ring, and drops her to the floor. Baszler slides back into the ring, presumably to get the countout win, while Mandy Rose checks on her tag team partner. Which is Shayna's cue to attack her, too.
Dana manages to shake off the cobwebs and fights off Shayna, even slamming her head into the ring apron. Back in the ring, however, Shayna gets the Clutch back on her opponent and grabs the win.
RESULT: Shayna Baszler defeats Dana Brooke
Rose comes into the ring to check on Dana and Shayna slaps the Clutch on HER, as well. Ouch.
Coming up next, Alexa Bliss will have a friendly little chat with Randy Orton.
(7:59pm) Alexa Bliss is in the ring, swinging on a swing, being adorable. She's talking about where the Fiend might be. She introduces Randy Orton, but he's not coming to the ring.
"I swear, you light a person on fire one time, and it goes straight to their head."
Orton is actually in the Firefly Funhouse! UH OH!
Orton straight up MURDERS Ramblin' Rabbit! AHHHHHHHH! It's enough to get Alexa to challenge Randy to a match tonight.
AJ Styles vs Elias is NEXT... after these commercial messages.
(8:12pm) Elias and Ryker make their entrance.
So.... is Elias a face now or....?
Things have been pretty even between Elias and Styles - with no interference from either of their cornermen - but Elias sends AJ shoulder-first into the ring post as USA Network heads to another ad break.
AJ gets tossed from the ring and the ref is distracted, yelling at Elias for... I dunno. Ryker decides to use the opportunity to sneak up on AJ... but stops in his tracks and slips to the floor when Omos steps up to him.
Elias nails AJ with a TKO and goes for the pin! AJ kicks out! Holy moley!
Phenomenal Forearm (Phorearm?) from AJ and the former WWE Champion picks up the win!
RESULT: AJ Styles defeats Elias
Ricochet vs Mustafa Ali is next.
Mustafa (apparently pronounced Moos-tah-fah tonight) Ali comes to the ring flanked by other members of RETRIBUTION.
After fighting off interference from the rest of RETRIBUTION, Ricochet gets Ali on the mat and goes for the shooting star press... but Ali gets his knees up and slaps on a crossface and gets the win.
RESULT: Mustafa Ali defeats Ricochet
Ali, once again, prods Ricochet to join his little club and asks him what his decision is. Ricochet says "no" and nails Ali with a Codebreak or whatever he calls it and slips away while the rest of RETRIBUTION stomps around and kicks the ropes and is all mad and stuff.
Nia Jax is going to be in the Royal Rumble match. Now you know.
RESULT: Charlotte Flair defeats Nia Jax
It's 8-man tag team action coming up next!
The New Day hit the ring first, followed by Jeff Hardy. Woods and Kingston absolutely rocking out to Hardy's theme music... Franchesca is even being used for some air guitar action by Xavier. Also, Hardy's face pain is absolutely on point tonight.
The Hurt Business are their opponents and Lashley takes this opportunity to announce that he's entering the Royal Rumble in January. Wheee.
Lashley gets the Hurt Lock on Hardy and this match is over.
RESULT: The Hurt Business defeat New Day, Riddle, and Jeff Hardy
The Miz and John Morrison sit on the steps inside the ThunderDome, all dejected and depressed. However, their moods are about to improve as Adam Pearce approaches them and, to his chagrin, hands the Money In The Bank briefcase back to the former WWE Champion and Real World cast member. Looks like Miz (and myself, for the record) was right - the cash in didn't count because it was Morrison who did it.
Holy crap, the celebration dance these two are doing is epic.
Alexa Bliss is in the ring, and she gestures for Randy Orton to come to the ring.
Orton comes to the ring. "OK, where is he?" he asks, expecting The Fiend
"This isn't about him," she says, "This is about ME"
She then brings a wrapped present into the ring. She opens it, and it has lighter fluid and matches inside.
Alexa: "I challenge you to do to ME what you did to HIM!"
My wife: "Well, this got dark really fast."
Alexa is tired of Orton's hesitation and pours the gasoline over her head.
"You think I won't do it?" And the lights go out. Randy lights the match and makes an evil face.... and.... that's the end of the show.
No, seriously. That's the end of the show.
I'm not joking. That's really the end of the episode. That stupid Christley show is on now,
Well... that was... different.
You know, I'm not going to gush and say this whole story and angle is amazing or anything but... it's different... I'll give it that.
Anyhoo... that's the last Raw of 2020. I'll see you all for the first SmackDown of 2021. Until then... I'm outta here,