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Impact Wrestling Results (3/1/12) - My Calves Are Better Than The Pigeons!

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Impact Wrestling Results - 3/1/2012
From Universal Studios in Orlando, Florida
Report by: Alex Barie of

Impact Wrestling starts off with a video package. It has the whole story between Roode and Sting. It had Roode slipping away each and every time. It shows Sting giving up as he states "I'm Done." Sting is not done though....done with his wrestling career that is. He and Roode will be battling it out at Victory Road!

The video stops and it shows a very crazy Kurt Angle backstage. He has cue cards and states that he is going to tell everyone why he is attacked Jeff Hardy a couple weeks ago. He is pretty psychotic. He leaves the camera shot and a brand new entrance theme plays. It shows all of the talent and their ability. It is a great opening. After that intro ends, Kurt Angle's music plays. He walks out on stage and down the ramp. As he does, footage plays of him attacking Jeff Hardy two weeks ago. It ends and Kurt is in the ring with a mic.

Kurt states that there are several reasons why he attacked Jeff Hardy two weeks ago. That is why he has cue cards. He states Jeff has lots of hair and Kurt doesn't! He paints it all sorts of colors but it doesn't make him a champion! (He came close though.) Secondly, Jeff Hardy's appearance disturbs Kurt. He wears makeup and socks on his arms. Kurt, on the other hand, dresses professionally. Kurt, at events, will be signing for hundreds of people. Where as, Jeff would come in late and the fans would go from Kurt to him. Finally, the girls just love Jeff. Girls scream and he tells them to shut up in the audience. Kurt says he is a one woman guy. Now, on top of all of that, Kurt has 100 figures, posters, etc. But, when he walks into his son's room, he sees Jeff Hardy posters. He then has Jeff Hardy action figures. His son then has a Hardy shirt. He goes to kiss his son goodnight, his son is dressed up like Jeff with the face paint and hair color and socks on the arm. His son just loves Jeff. Everywhere Kurt goes, it reminds him of how much the fans love him. Kurt then states that there is only one solution for Kurt himself. He calls Jeff Hardy out. Kurt stays silent as the fans chant Jeff's name. Jeff's music plays and here he comes. He walks out on stage and the crowd cheers. Jeff interacts with the fans from the ramp. He gets in the ring.

Kurt says Jeff thinks he is so cool. He goes on to say that this is why Jeff is not world champion (those reasons). Here is the solution: Jeff will face Kurt at Victory Road and there is where Kurt will destroy Jeff. He asks Jeff if it's a done deal. Jeff slaps Kurt in the face and then takes his legs out from underneath him. He starts pounding on Kurt with fists to the head. TNA officials run out and break them up. Jeff then jumps on Kurt again, but Kurt is able to slide out of the ring. Jeff gets on the mic and says he speaks for all of the creatures and he accepts the match.

Bobby Roode is backstage with the TNA World Title over his shoulder. He says he is the "it" factor of professional wrestling. He is champion while Sting is nothing. Roode then goes on to state that his match with Sting is bad business. There are plenty of other stars who deserve a match. Sting is washed up and should stay out of the ring. Just then, Austin Aries is backstage as he appears in the camera shot. Austin talks about Sting as he states what he felt on Twitter last week and it didn't sit to well. He goes on to talk about Sting more. Roode asks if Austin has time and Austin says he has even more time for him. They walk away together.


Christy Hemme is in the ring as she announces the first match. Daniels and Kazarian walk down the ramp as the crowd boos. After they are in the ring, AJ's music plays. He comes on stage as he goes through the sparks that fly down from above. He makes his way to the ring.

AJ gets on the mic as Daniels and Kazarian exit the ring. AJ says he has something for them. If and when AJ beats them, everything comes out in the open for everyone to hear. Daniels gets on the mic and says that he is the face of TNA. They do not have to give in to what AJ wants. Kazarian grabs the mic and says that he's got it! Just then, AJ jumps over the ropes and lands right on Daniels. He slides Daniels in the ring as the match starts.

Daniels and Kazarian vs. AJ Styles in a Gauntlet Match

AJ stays in control as he puts Daniels in a corner and then another corner and does some knife edge chops. He grapples with a backbreaker and then a "gut breaker". He continues the attack with stomps. He lifts Daniels up and then drops him down for a suplex, but without holding him up for quite sometime. He covers, but Daniels kicks out. AJ grabs the legs of Daniels and goes to stomp on his gut, but Kazarian was about to enter. AJ kicks the ropes for Kazarian to get away.


The show returns as Daniels runs into the ropes. As he comes to the center, AJ does a tremendous dropkick. Daniels is down. AJ exits the ring and talks to Kazarian as he continues to stand outside. Daniels comes behind him and hits him. He then attacks him again and slides him in the ring. He gets AJ up and whips him in the ropes. He does a back body drop. He continues the attack with shots to the head and back. He gets AJ up with shots to the back. AJ comes back with shots to the face of Daniels. Daniels whips AJ in the corner, but AJ jumps up. Daniels is able to hit him and AJ falls down. Daniels covers, but he kicks out. Daniels gets AJ up from behind, but AJ gets away and hits the pele. Both are down. Kazarian is at ringside as he pounds on the mat. Both get up and AJ hits Daniels with closelines and a spin kick. he gets to the apron and hits a springboard flying forearm. Both get up and AJ puts Daniels on his shoulders. He drops him down shoulder and back first on his knee. He covers Daniels, but he kicks out. AJ sets up the Styles Clash, but Daniels gets away. He hits Aj in the chest and then sweeps him down. Daniels slowly gets up. AJ is now up. Just then, Kazarian gets in the ring. He picks AJ up and drops him down on his head behind him. DQ: Daniels Kazarian covers AJ and gets the pin. Winner: Kazarian Kazarian looks at Daniels and then gets out of the ring. He walks up the ramp as Daniels follows him. Looks like there will be no information revealed.

Madison Rayne is backstage. She is looking at pictures of Gail Kim on the wall. Gail comes in. Madison tells her that trading cards were blown up to show how great Gail looks. Gail says she wants to make-up what happened last week with a spa day, but that is tomorrow. As for today, Gail is giving Madison a match. She will face ODB! Madison doesn't like that at all and states she would rather have it be tomorrow. Gail leaves and Madison chases her.


Christy Hemme is in the ring as she announces this match. Madison Rayne is the first one to the ring. She comes out. Gail Kim is right behind her. Madison isn't happy at all. She gets in the ring as Gail looks on. She claps for Madison as she is in the ring. ODB's music plays. She comes to the ring along with Eric Young. ODB has her flask in hand as she drinks away. Both get in the ring and taunt. Eric grabs the flask and exits the ring.

Madison Rayne vs. ODB

The bell sounds and both move around the ring. As they lock-up, Madison knees ODB and then puts her against the ropes. She whips her, but ODB reverses and just knocks Madison down with her chest. Madison gets up and goes to leave, but ODB grabs her and puts her in the corner. She hits her right in the chest. She then slams Madison in the other corner. She goes face first into the turnbuckles and each turnbuckle multiple times. ODB walks away and then runs to her. She goes for that buster move as Madison sits in the corner, but Madison kicks her. ODB falls back. Madison continues the attack. Madison goes to do the knee to the head drop, but ODB pushes her away. ODB hits her and Madison falls. Both get up and Madison tries to fight back, but ODB ducks and smashes into Madison in the corner. ODB continues to hit Madison as she falls back in the corner. She sits down and this time ODB does a successful buster move. Eric gets on the apron and takes his shirt off. He distracts the referee. Gail gets up and tries to distract the referee. ODB lifts Madison up and drops her right down on her head. She covers and gets the win. Eric gets in the ring and he celebrates with ODB. Winner: ODB

A video plays showing Brandon Jacobs huge impact last week as he put Ray through a table.

Bully Ray is backstage. He is talking to some lady backstage. He tells her that she looks worse and worse each time he sees her. He then talks about James Storm as he was the one who brought Jacobs in TNA. Roode and Austin Aries get in the camera shot. Roode tells the lady to leave. Ray tells her to call him. Roode says Bully blaming Jacobs is pathetic. Ray then fights back as he states he's bad that some guy with paint on his face kicked Roode in "no man's land". Ray then asks Austin why he is here. Roode states that they are going to end it tonight. Roode tells Ray to call him and Austin says the same. They leave Ray.

Velvet Sky is backstage. She is pretty upset on her status. Sarita and Angelina Love come into the camera and say Love is a crybaby. Sky is not going to take that as she starts attacking them.


Velvet Sky is backstage as this was shown before the commercial break. This was taped earlier today. Sky talks about the Battle Royal as Madison is the #1 Contender. Sky was suppose to win. It is her time and she is sick of it. Just then, Angelina Love and Sarita appear. They attack Sky. They grab her and whip her right into a wall. Sky falls. Mickie comes and checks on Sky as Love and Sarita leave.

Ric Flair and Eric Bishoff are talking to Garett Bischoff. Gunner is also there. Ric tells him about being there next week. If he shows up, then he will not be a very great camper. Garett is fine with that as he walks away. Ric can't believe that he isn't threatened.

Roode, Aries, and Ray are walking backstage together. Looks like they all met up.


Music plays and here comes the TNA World Champion, Bobby Roode, the X-Division Champion, Austin Aries, and Bully Ray. They walk down the ramp as the crowd boos. Ray shows off his calves again. He states that it is a much better sight than the pigeons. They all enter the ring as Roode grabs the mic.

Roode says he is the reason why every fan is in the audience is there tonight. He is also the reason why everyone is watching at home. Roode is the most dominate champion in the history of this company. He wants to explain something to Sting. Sting is only an authority figure. He is not an active wrestler. Sting should not put his hands on the champ and he should not book himself in a match with the champ at Victory Road. Tonight, Roode is going to do something that Sting should have done. There won't be a match between them two at Victory Road. Roode announces that, "I am done." Ray gets on the mic and mentions his calves again. He thinks it's a painting like the Mona Lisa. He was going to blame James, well he was blaming James, but now he is blaming Sting. Sting brought Jacobs in and had him jump the railing and had him come in the ring to put Ray through a table. It was Sting to cause the biggest embarrassment of Ray's career. Ray points to the titan torn as it replays the Jacobs' chokeslam. Ray and his calves are done! Austin now gets on the mic and he tells the crowd to "shhh". He has been quiet for the past couple of weeks as he has seen everything unfold. He states that Sting is one of those people who do not know when to step out of the ring. Sting is jealous of Roode, Ray, and Austin. Austin says two things followed him everywhere. That is angry people and championships. He deserves to be in the main event. Just like Roode and Ray, Austin states that he is done. He drops the mic and they all sit down on the mat. Ray lies on his side and grabs the mic. He says they are not moving. WELL, the lights go out. They come back on and Sting is kneeling in the ring. Roode jumps back and so does everyone else when they see him.

Sting says he was just playing mind games with the "I'm Done". It is either that they are done or they are just stirring things up. They all state they are done. Sting says that he was going to beat up Roode at the PPV, but how can he do that if he doesn't have a job. Also, the titles will be stripped from them if they are done. Bully wouldn't get paid if he is done. He asks them one more time. They look around the arena. Sting goes to Austin. He says he is right as he hasn't been in the main event. That is going to change. He will team with Roode and Ray and face Magnus and Joe "I'm going to kill you" and James Storm! Tah Tah for now! Sting's music plays as the lights shut off. They come back on and Sting is gone as all three were surrounding him. They have no idea where he went.


Impact Wrestling comes back with a video package of Jesse Sorensen. He is shown in the hospital. It then shows a member of his family. It's a very sincere and emotional video. Jesse will not give up. Live your day as you never know what will happen next. Jesse wants to get back in the ring and in front of everyone.

Zema Ion is backstage as this was taped earlier today. He says he has no remorse. He is loving the fact that he is #1 Contender for the X-Division Championship. He will do anything to put on a show. Backflips and breaking people's necks!

Shannon Moore's music hits and he comes to the ring. The crowd cheers. After he is in the ring, Zema Ion comes on stage. He comes down in his cocky way as the fans boo. He uses his hairspray to the max. Can't mess him his hair!

Shannon Moore vs. Zema Ion

Both move around the ring and lock-up. Shannon gets behind Zema, lifts him up and slams him down. Both get up and Zema applies headlock. He goes to whip him, but he grabs the hair of Shannon and comes back for the headlock. Shannon pushes him away and comes back as he slams him down. He gets up and Zema is whipped into the ropes. He slides out of the ring. Shannon grabs the ropes and flies. He does not land on Zema but is able to stand up. Zema does a closeline as he knocks Shannon down. He puts him back in the ring. Zema climbs the corner, jumps, and hits a missile dropkick to Shannon. He gets Shannon up, but Shannon tries to fight back, but Zema lifts Shannon up and chokes him on the rope and then does a neck breaker. Zema climbs the corner, but Shannon makes him trip. He climbs the corner and does a huge hurricanrona maneuver. He then climbs another corner and goes for the moonsault, but Zema moves out of the way. He gets Shannon up, drops him down....OH....face first on his knee. He covers Shannon for the win. Zema gets his hairspray and sprays it so his hair stays in place once again. Winner: Zema Ion


A video is shown with fans talking about how they love TNA's Impact Wrestling. They say it's all about wrestling as there isn't another wrestling style like this out there. They give it great reviews. TNA interacts great with the fans.

Sarita and Angelina Love walk down the ramp. They get into ring as they taunt on separate corners. Mickie James' music plays and she skips her way down the ramp. She waits at the bottom. She points to the entrance. Velvet Sky runs down the ramp and slides right in.

Sarita and Angelina Love vs. Mickie James and Velvet Sky

Sky goes right after Love and Mickie gets in to toss Sarita out of the ring. Sky and Love start the match. Sky whips Love into the ropes and bends over, but Love stops and snaps her head back to the mat. Sky is able to get up and tosses Love arose the ring. She tags in Mickie. Mickie does a hurricanrona move. She covers, but Love kicks out. She crawls over and tags Sarita. She enters, but Mickie does a flapjack. She covers but she kicks out. Mickie gets her up and puts her in Sarita's own corner. Mickie knocks Love off the apron. Mickie goes after Sarita . She snaps her forward and runs into the ropes, but Love pulls the ropes down and Mickie falls through. Sarita gets up, runs and does a great suicide dive when Mickie stands. Sarita and Love bring Mickie back in. Sarita covers, but Mickie kicks out. Love gets tagged and she attacks Mickie. She puts her in her (Love's) corner. She chokes her with her boot. She backs up after the count from the referee. Mickie tries to fight back as she hits Love and Sarita, but Love knocks her down, covers, but Mickie kicks out. Sarita is tagged. She enters and does a submission move. She bends the body back. She then lets go and elbows Mickie right in the back. She gets Mickie up and whips her in the corner. She runs to Mickie, but she moves out of the way, bends down and does a roll-up to Sarita. Sarita kicks out at two. Both get up and hit each other as they fall. They crawl to their corners and tag in their partners. Sky attacks Love. She drops her down on her back and covers, but Sarita breaks the cover. Sarita grabs Sky from behind. Love runs to her, but Sky kicks her and then fights Sarita off. Mickie gets on the top rope and jumps on Sarita. They get out of the ring. Sky gets up and Love goes for the lethal injection, but Sky ducks. She hits Love with the "x-factor" and gets the win. It becomes the Direct Impact of the Night. Winners: Velvet Sky and Mickie James

James Storm is backstage. He says he is tired of hearing the same thing from Roode. His match with him will be in his hometown inside of steel cage. Magnus and Joe are beside him. Magnus says that this is a weird tag team as it has different people from different places, but everyone said Joe and Magnus wouldn't work. Magnus says this is going to be fun! Here they come!


A camera shows the Impact crowd as they are cheering and waving their arms. Mike Tenay states that a letter was sent to Abyss' family on his whereabouts as we haven't seen him lately. Footage is played showing the last time we saw Abyss. It has him getting out of Immortal. He doesn't want Immortal but wants Ray. He fights Ray. Here is one brutal match. Abyss picks up the win. Following that, Ray attacks Abyss backstage. It then has Ray. The cameraman asks where he is. Ray says he doesn't know where he is. The video ends and goes to the stage.

Roode, Aries and Ray come on stage together. As Ray and Austin walk down the ramp, Roode raises his arms and fireworks explode on the stage. They get in the ring. After they are in the ring, here comes Samoa Joe and Magnus. The TNA Tag Team Titles are over their shoulder. As they get to the ring, the fans cheer and chant "Joe". Finally, James Storm's music plays. He comes on stage with hat and trench coat. Fireworks explode for him too. He gets in the ring. As he does, his opponents exit the ring. Jeremy Borash introduces this main event.

Austin Aries, Bully Ray, and Bobby Roode vs. Brutas Magnus, Samoa Joe, and James Storm in a 6 Man Tag Team Match

Magnus and Aries start the match. They move around the ring quickly. As they go to lock-up, Austin rolls through. They then lock-up and Magnus takes control as he works on Austin's arm. Austin rolls around, gets out of it, and gets Magnus to his feet. He backs up and both stand to their feet. Austin shows his cocky attitude as he taunts to the fans. Austin then puts his hand up to do a test of strength. Magnus reaches and overtakes Austin's height. Austin then kicks Magnus' leg. He runs into the ropes and does a handstand. He runs to Magnus and he flips Austin with a closeline. Austin backs up and Roode tags himself in. Magnus backs up and tags James. James runs in but Roode runs right out of the ring.


Ray and James are fighting in the ring. Ray takes a shot to Storm and he goes in the corner. Ray does some kicks to the gut and right hands right to James. He hits him in the head and then the ribs. James backs back and does a shot and a neck breaker. Storm works on the arm of Ray as he twists it and slams it in the mat. James tags in Joe. He gets in and Ray gets up. They lock-up. They take shot after shot, back and forth. Ray chops the chest while Joe punches. They go into the ropes and Ray hits him the first time and they go in the ropes again and Joe does a leg lariat. Ray tas in Austin. Austin gets manhandled by Joe. He tags in Magnus. They do a double team. Just then, Roode is tagged in as Joe leaves the ring. Magnus goes over and James gets in. Roode exits the ring quickly again. He slowly comes in. He gets in the ring and tags Aries. James grabs the ropes and flips Austin over it. He tags Joe back in. Joe does shot after shot to the head of Austin in the corner. He whips him in the opposing corner. Austin goes away and then runs to Joe in the corner, but he simply moves and Austin crashes and burns. Joe gets Austin up for the muscle buster, but Roode gets in and stops it. Everything becomes chaotic. Austin is able to hit the crucifix on Joe. He tags in Ray. Ray waits for Joe and hits a neck breaker. He goes to get back up and Ray hits Joe in the back. He tags in Roode. Roode chokes Joe with the ropes. Joe comes back and tries to hit his opponents on the apron, but Roode grabs Joe and plants his head into the corner. He kicks him. He gets Joe back up and takes some shots to his chest. He snaps him forward and then jumps over him to snap his head forward on the mat. Roode plays mind games with Storm and it gets him furious.

James gets in, but the referee holds him back. Ray enters from a tag and does a neck breaker. Austin now comes in as he climbs the corner. He does an elbow to his back. He brings Joe over and smashes his head into the boot of Ray, which was on the top corner. Joe fights back though as he attacks each person, but Austin tags in Ray. He enters and continues the assault. Joe comes back with some right hands, but Ray knocks him down. Ray tags in Roode. Roode enters. He hits Joe on the back of the head. He then knocks Magnus off the corner. Joe gets up in the corner. Roode runs to him, but Joe lifts him up and brings him hard down to the mat. Joe crawls over and tags James. Austin sneaks in. James closelines him and then does a flapjack. He then attacks Rully. Finally, Roode gets up and James is all over him. He does a back body drop. Just then, Ray enters and hits Storm from behind. He puts him in the corner and does multiple shots. He whips Storm, but Storm reverses an Magnus jumps from another corner on Ray. Austin enters and Joe does a jumping kick to the head. He then gets taken out. Joe gets choked on the ropes and he is down. Storm brings Roode down on his knee. Roode bounces up. Storm does a big time last call super kick and gets the pin!!!! Winners: James Storm, Samoa Joe, and Magnus

Ray enters the ring with a steel chair. He hits Magnus right in the back with it. Storm gets up and Ray throws the chair to Storm. He then does a big boot right to it. The chair smashes right in the face of Storm. He is down and out. Ray bends over and says he is going to take Storm out along with taking his best friend's World Title. There will be no room in the cage for Storm. The show fades.

Top 5 Rankings:

1. James Storm- Up from last week
2. Bully Ray- New from last week
3. Bobby Roode- Same from last week
4. Zeme Ion- Same from last week
5. ODB- New from last week

Alex's Assumptions:

I follow Eric Bischoff pretty in a pretty serious way on Twitter. I have all his tweets come right to my phone. While there is a reason why I have that, I want to go right into what his tweets have been recently. He has been retweeting people's tweets about Impact Wrestling. These tweets state how they are liking the show recently. Well, that is the same way I feel. While I have been a fan of Impact Wrestling for quite some time, I remember that they had a show that I strongly disliked. I mean I was bored and it was just a bad show. Well, that has changed. It seems that the past three weeks have been great! TNA produced two great shows in a row and now they produced a third one, which is this week's episode. I liked the opening of the show. It showed the crazy side of Kurt backstage. He then is in the ring and has some great reasons why he dislikes Jeff. I stated here last week that I was wondering when Kurt would say why he attacked Jeff. I don't have to ask that this week. Their match at the PPV should be pretty interesting. Reminds me of Kurt's ranking thing where he went to battle each star in the Top/Power 10 thing TNA had about two years ago. I thought that would be the last time we see Jeff vs. Kurt, but nope! Switching gears....I love the whole situation between Roode, Austin, and Ray. I liked how Austin joined with Roode on how they disliked Sting. They then switch the opinion of Ray. It shows how Ray can flow with anyone he wants but he just turns to get his way. It was very nice to see Austin and Joe in the main event. Can it be a bright sign for future main event matches? I sure hope so! I don't mind Roode and Storm in the main event though. They deserve it and I love seeing them. They have developed tremendously over the past 6 months. Ray is right up there with them. I don't know who is a bigger heel: Roode or Ray. This show had a x-division match and Knockout action. Jesse Sorensen's video was a shot of reality for everyone. Ion took advantage of it (which I have no problem with it as you do what you do to get over. TNA should not take any heat from that at all). As for the knockouts, I love the Bully Ray reference with his calves and pigeon talk. It just had to be the title of the results! Hopefully this streak of great shows continue. If you want to hear more from me, follow me on Twitter (link in my bio). Also check out my personal blogs (link below in my bio also). Comments are welcome and I would love to discuss the show with you!

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