Monday Night Raw Results (3/7/16) - Road Block Is Just Some Clever Name Some Idiot In Marketing Came Up With


WWE Raw Results (3/7/16)
Monday, March 7th, 2016
From Allstate Arena in Chicago, IL
Report by Zack Krasney of

Hello everyone and welcome back to Monday Night Raw! We are only weeks away from WrestleMania! We have one last pitstop in Road Block, and it looks like we're getting a WWE Championship match on the way. Question of the Week: Does Dean Ambrose have a shot at winning the WWE World Heavyweight Championship?

Monday Night Raw Results

Raw kicks off with the prodigal son! Shane McMahon!

Shane- That's overwhelming! Thank you. Man did I miss you guys. What's up, Chicago! I'm loving this! Let me take you back to last Monday Night. I was watching Raw with my three sons and there's my opponent The Undertaker, who I have the utmost respect for. Then I hear from Vincent Kennedy McMahon. Who I lost a lot of respect for last Monday. Not only did he write me out of his will, he renounced me as his son. I looked down at those three little faces and said, guys, I think we need to make a new award, what do you think about giving Pop father of the year. Well, Dad, I wanted to say you are an egomaniacal evil old bastard. And you've lost your touch, you lost your touch with your business, with your fan base, with reality, with me and with your grandsons. All that does just fuels me gets me hot. I'm gonna use all that because it's my destiny to be in control of Monday Night Raw. It's all gonna stop, the chairman's torrential grasp on everything, that stops. The authority, that stops. All the backstabbing and backstage politics stops because it's choking the life out of this business. There are so many guys with so much talent that doesn't get any breaks, then there are guys with no talent that get all the breaks. That stops! And at WrestleMania, I don't know how I'm going to do it, but it's my destiny to defeat the Undertaker. Ther will be a new legacy as the next night I take control of Monday Night Raw.


It ends up being a fake out and Vince's music starts playing. The chairman makes his way out.

Vince- Disappointed?! I bet you are. You wanted to see the Undertaker come out and dismember Shane. You see the look in his eyes? That was a look of fear. Justifiably so, when you get in the ring with Undertaker it is utter sheer terror. Let's have a little father-son chat. I was at my desk last week writing you out of the will. By the way, Stephanie gets everything. I see a photo of you and me, you were just a little guy and we were going on your first trip to your first wrestling match. Since you're no longer my son *he drops and steps on picture* You grow up thinking your dad can't make mistakes, that he's invincible. I think I allowed you to think the same. The problem is I'm Vince McMahon, you're just Vince's son. Speaking of sons, that leads me to yours. They're going to feel something you've never felt before because they're going to watch their dad fail. When you go to the hospital they're going to see you broken, but I'll wrap my arms around them and tell them they have at least one father figure who isn't a failure. My greatest creation will put to rest my greatest failure. Security come out here and help Shane out of the building!

Shane- Woah woah woah, back down a little. I'll walk out peacefully but no one better touch me because I'm a little amped up right now.

Vince- Get him!

Shane- I'm warning you.

Security tries to grab him but Shane unleashes on the security guards! He beats them MMA style and he looks great! He gestures for Vince to get in the ring, but Vince goes to the back.

Kevin Owens vs. Neville

They lock up to start with and Owens puts Neville in the corner. Owens with a headlock on Neville. Owens with a shoulder block. Neville gets in the corner but Owens stomps away at Neville. He calls Cole an idiot and goes back to beating down Neville. Owens mocks Neville but Neville kicks Owens in the face. It just upsets KO who hits a running senton as punishment. Clothesline to Neville and Owens tries for the senton again but this time, Neville gets his knees up. Neville fights back with kicks then a running forearm. Owens gets knocked out of the ring and Neville goes to do a spinning flip over the top rope but Owens moves! Neville lands on his feet shockingly! Owens grabs Neville and throws him hard into the steel stairs. We head to break.

Owens has a chin lock locked in on Neville as we return. Owens throws Neville into the corner and tries the cannonball but Neville rolls out of danger. Owens counters a German suplex with a German of his own. Neville counters a 2nd cannonball with an enziguri. Neville goes to the top rope and hits a shooting star press to Owens on the outside! Neville rolls Owens in and hits a standing shooting press and gets a 2 count. Neville puts Owens on the top rope, but Owens fights back with body shots. Neville drops down and Owens goes for a moonsault but misses! Superkick from Neville and he capitalize with Red Arrow! 1-2-No!! Owens kicks out somehow! Kevin Owens rolls up Neville and grabs the tights! 1-2-3.

Winner: Kevin Owens

Neville complains to the ref about the tights and Owens attacks Neville. He beats him down and throws him into the steel post. He goes to the outside and sets him out for the Powerbomb to the ringside. SAMI ZAYN runs out and makes the save! Sami takes down Owens and beats him down. Neville helps him clear Owens out of the ring.

Backstage Zack Ryder and Dolph Ziggler are talking when Steph walks up. Zack slinks away.

Steph- Hey Dolph thanks for taking down that tweet earlier, I'm sure you didn't mean to say anything discouraging about the Authority.

Ziggler- Funny you mention Survivor Series when I beat your team single handed. Remember that?

Steph- No not really, considering I'm standing here still your boss.

Ziggler- its ok history tends to repeat itself. Your brother Shane wins and puts you and The Authority out of power.

Steph- Obviously you're delusional just like all the fans, but enjoy Shane while he's back because the Undertaker is going to destroy my brother at WrestleMania. You've got me thinking about Survivor Series Dolph, how about you compete in a tag elimination match tonight? It'll be you versus three members of the League of Nations. Oh and no partners for you.

Ziggler- Wouldn't have it any other way.

Brie Bella vs. Summer Rae

Summer slams the head of Brie to the mat. Brie takes down Summer and locks in a half Boston crab but Summer makes it to the ropes. Summer locks in a submission of her own, she puts her knee in the back of Brie and pulls her arms backward. Summer tries a kick but Brie blocks it and does the Daniel Bryan kicks. Brie capitalizes with Brie Mode. Brie tries for a crossbody from the corner but Summer moves. Lana's music hits and she comes down to ringside. Summer rolls up Brie from behind for the win off the distraction.

Winner: Summer Rae

Lana gets into the ring and attacks Brie. Lana hits Brie's finisher on Brie to add insult to injury.

Dean Ambrose makes his way to the ring. He stands with his arms out and stares for a minute.

Dean- The road to WrestleMania was clear and everyone knew where they were going. I was heading toward Suplex city and Triple H thought he was going to WrestleMania as champ. Everything is set in stone, posters are made up. Then Dean Ambrose shows up and screws up everything by challenging Triple H to a title match at Road Block. How inconvenient. I know it's bad timing 3 weeks before WrestleMania. I don't care what Triple H's plans were, I don't care what Roman Reigns' plans were! Fact of the matter is this Saturday Night I'm hijacking WrestleMania and the WWE Championship whether anyone likes it or not! This poor attitude has got me in trouble with some people. People who tell me I should know my place and bow down to authority. Triple H tried to beat that respect into me. Nice try! You want to talk about respect, you will respect me this Saturday when I drill your head into the mat and beat you. You will respect me because I will be the face of your company! This face is gonna be on Oprah, on People magazine. I am gonna go to ribbon cutting and schools. I love kids, they're like regular people but...little. In fact, I'm the poster child for kids...don't try this at home. I'm gonna make Triple H buy me a brand new shiny suit. He's gonna buy me a lapel pin. I need to learn how to use a lapel pin. Come to think of it I'm never gonna wear a suit. Not that I don't look good in a suit. Come to think of it, all the stuff that comes with being champion sucks. Being champion sounds pretty amazing. Putting it all on the line every night. Fighting every night! Being the kind of champion that these people deserve!

Triple H's music hits and he comes to the ramp.

HHH- Isn't that a fun little fantasy Dean. I almost hate to be the guy who ruins it for you. The reality is this title is going to stay with me as long as I want to. Roman Reigns thought he could take it away from me and they're gluing his face back together. Maybe you need to have another trip over to that announce table.

Dean- You know I'm not one for making plans, but maybe I will. I will go back to that announce table this Saturday at Road Block when I beat you. I'll stand on the table and hold up the WWE Championship. And then, you can suck it.

HHH- Dean, let me let you in on a little secret. Road Block is just a clever name some idiot in marketing came up with. You are not a road block, you're a speed bump or pothole. I can see why you and Roman are such good friends. You both have that attitude, that disrespect for authority. Let me asking you, hows that anti-authority thing working out for Roman? Not so well. You know Dean, those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

Dean- You sound like my 10th-grade teacher Mr. Hammerstone. What are you going to put me in detention?

HHH- Stop with the whole delusional thing. That was fun for a second Dean, but if you keep going with it, you're gonna get hurt permanently.

Dean- Hurt? Hurt ain't so bad. And delusional has got me this far. I'd rather be delusional than be whatever you are.

HHH- Whatever I am? I am driven! You can say by whatever you want; money, power, success. What makes you is honestly what makes you, you.

Dean- You know I'm having a little trouble hearing you, maybe you bust an ear drum last week. Why don't you come into this ring? Why don't you come a little closer, just so I can hear you a little better?

HHH- Dean. You guys want me to go fight Dean Ambrose right now. Here's the thing I don't fight on your time, I fight on my time. Dean, you'll get your shot this Saturday, but until then as far as tonight goes. I'm going to do what successful people do, I'm going to delegate. Tonight Dean Ambrose goes 1 on 1 with the new face of fear, Bray Wyatt. And Dean whether you learn it tonight or at Road Block, you'll learn the Authority always wins.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Wade Barret, Rusev, and Sheamus

Barrett is starting things off with Dolph. Wade kicks Dolph in the gut and then knees him in the gut. Dolph hits a dropkick to even the odds. Sheamus hits a cheap shot and Barrett hits winds of change. 2 count. Tag to Sheamus who hits the 10 beats on Dolph. Tag to Rusev who collides with Dolph. 2 count. Dolph runs face first into a dropkick from Rusev. Tag to Barrett who puts Ziggler on his stomach on the top turnbuckle and kicks the gut of Dolph. Tag to Sheamus. The Celtic Warrior gets rolled up but only a 1 count for The Showoff. Sheamus shoulder tackles the ribs of Dolph. Dolph fights back with jabs and a jumping DDT. Tag to Barrett who sprints at Ziggler, but ends up shoulder first in the steel post. Ziggler hits a clothesline. Splash from Dolph and a swinging neckbreaker. Rusev runs in but eats a kick. Superkick to Barrett! 1-2-3

Wade Barret is eliminated

Sheamus runs in and eats a superkick! Rusev breaks up the pinfall. Sheamus tries the Brogue kick but misses. Dolph tries the fameasser but misses. Rusev hits a cheap kick from the outside. Sheamus connects with the Brogue Kick. 1-2-3.

Winners: League of Nations

Becky bangs on the door of Sasha Banks and tells her it's time to go. Sasha comes out and says if it weren't for Charlotte and Ric she would have beaten Becky on Raw and Smackdown. Becky says she would have won but that doesn't matter, it's a Triple Threat now. Tonight they have Naomi and Tamina so they should focus on that.

Becky Lynch and Sasha Banks vs. Tamina and Naomi

Charlotte and Ric are at ringside for this one. Becky and Tamina start it off. Tamina blasts Becky and knocks Sasha down from the side. Tamina and Naomi double team Becky while the ref is arguing with Sasha. Tamina throws Becky in the corner and hits a splash. She tries for a second but misses. Both teams make tags. Sasha takes down Naomi and hits a big kick. Double knees by Sasha. Tamina runs in to break up the pin but Becky takes her out. Sasha hits the Banks Statement for the tap out win.

Winner: Sasha Banks and Becky Lynch

Charlotte runs in and attacks both Sasha and Becky.

Backstage R-Truth brings Goldust a Chicago style deep dish pizza to try and convince him he's sorry and wants to be tag team partners. Goldust says he's lactose intolerant so if he eats even a slice his butt will explode and Truth probably knew that. This was just a mean prank to get back at Goldust. Truth says he swears he didn't know! Goldust walks away.


Kofi- Woah, hold up hold up. Stakes are at an all time high because at 197 days and counting, you are witnessing the best reign in WWE history! Who gonna stop us Y2AJ?

All- Laugh

Woods- Pretty soon this team is going to rip itself apart like the zombies in Walking Dead.

Big E- We are a real tag team. We even got matching team tattoos.

Woods- I have a Triforce on my arm.

Kofi- We thought you were joking.

Big E- Oh...yeah. I was kidding, too. I definitely didn't get a pink and blue unicorn tattoo on my cheeks with a rainbow.

Kofi- Oh E....

Y2J and AJ Styles come out.

New Day vs. Y2AJ for the WWE Tag Team Championships

Kofi and Jericho start things off. Shoulder tackle by Kofi but Chris pops up and hits a dropkick. Chops from Jericho and then he launches Kofi over the top rope. Big E runs in but AJ sends him over the top, too. AJ and Styles do syncronized springboard crossbodies. We head to break.

We return and Big E has Jericho in a headlock. Jericho breaks free but runs into a big elbow. E puts Chris in the corner and starts the unicorn stampede. Kofi hammers away at Jericho and tags Big E. E runs at Jericho in the corner but Jericho gets his feet up. Tag to Kofi who tries to stop a tag, but Chris hits an enziguri. Tag to AJ! Running forearm! AJ hits a flip into a reverse DDT. 2 count! Jawbreaker from Kofi who tags Big E. AJ goes for the springboard forearm but Big E catches him. He hits the Big Ending with Kofi's leaping assist. 1-2-Jericho plows through Kofi to break up the pin! Big E gets knocked down. Both teams make tags. Jericho with a shoulder tackle. Jericho to the top rope hits the ax handle. Dropkick to Big E to knock him down. Kofi rolls up Chris but only gets a 2 count. Forearm by Jericho. Lionsault from Jericho and a tag is made at the same time. Styles hits a 450 splash from a springboard! 1-2-Big E pulls Kofi out of the ring. AJ with a springboard forearm to Big E on the outside. Kofi rolls up AJ as he gets in the ring! Only a 2. Kofi with a huge kick to AJ! Jericho tags in and catches Kofi in Walls of Jericho! Woods tries to move the ropes for Kofi. AJ takes him out. Big E takes out AJ! Big E tags Kofi. Big E tries the Big Ending but gets driven into the steel post. Jericho goes for the Code Breaker but Big E catches him! Big E turns it into Big Ending for the win!

Winners: New Day

After the match AJ goes to help Jericho up, but Chris hits a Code Breaker out of nowhere! AJ slowly makes it to his feet and Jericho hits another Code Breaker. AJ slowly climbs up Jericho's body to his feet and Chris hits a third Code Breaker. Jericho goes and gets a Y2AJ shirt and shoves it in AJ's mouth.

Renee catches up with Chris Jericho. She asks him about his actions. He says all they chant is AJ Styles, AJ Styles, AJ Styles. They're not going to be chanting for AJ Styles anymore.

Kalisto vs. Tyler Breeze

Breeze kicks the gut of Kalisto. Kalisto and Breeze jump over each other back and forth. Breeze gets Kalisto on the corner, Kalisto fights him back and leaps at him but Breeze hits a kick to take Kalisto out midair. Breeze attacks with elbows and then locks in a chin lock. Kick to the head of Breeze from Kalisto who follows up with a corkscrew springboard elbow. Kalisto with Salida Del Sol for the win.

Winner: Kalisto

We see a video package for the newest WWE Hall of Fame inductee, Big Boss Man!

Backstage JoJo interviews Kalisto. She asks him what he's looking forward to the most going into WrestleMania. He says WrestleMania has always been a dream of his. A moment to live forever. Ryback cuts a promo telling him that just because he wears a mask, doesn't make him a superhero. Ryback tells Kalisto he needs to fly solo. He questions how he doesn't have a match at WrestleMania. Ryback says to watch what he does in his match next against the social butterflies.

The Social Outcasts come out.

Slater- WWE Universe! Yeah! Social Outcasts are here tonight baybay! Now trending!

Bo- Ryback says he doesn't want to be a part of anymore teams. It makes he sad all the things he's missing out on. He can't play team dodgeball.

Slater- And he can't be on my show on called game night.

Bo- He can't be one of the new busters.

Rose- I think you have to be a girl, too.

Bo- And he can't be one of us! The 4 best friends the world has ever known!

Axel- He got a fluke win over my buddy Adam last week, but tonight the Ax man cometh! Ye! Ye!

All- Ye! Ye! Ye!

Feed Me More!

Ryback vs. Curtis Axel

We return from break and Ryback is throwing Axel across the ring. Axel fights back but eats a thesz press. Ryback hits a running high knee on Axel. Axel manages to attack Ryback as he's getting back in the ring but Ryback turns the tables and he starts hammering away with both fists on Axel's head. Shellshock to Axel for the win.

Winner: Ryback

Backstage Vince is on the phone when Steph walks in.

Steph- Sorry to interupt but we need to do something about Shane.

Vince- What about Shane.

Steph- Did you see him earlier? I know the deck is stacked against him, but what if? He doesn't use his brain, he's fearless. I mean he is your son.

Vince- I got this ok?

Steph- But what if you don't?

Vince- I said I got this, ok?

Dean Ambrose vs. Bray Wyatt

Wyatt- Our fates will forever be intertwined, Dean. At Road Block I have a chance to do something you could not do time and time again. That is to conquer the conqueror. To slay the beast. That's Saturday, tonight I'm going to use you as an example to show the world how cruel and dangerous I can be. The eater of worlds! Chicago...I'm here!

They lock up but Bray hits some body shots quickly. Bray kicks Dean in the face. Dean hits a leaping clothesline. Dean locks in a submission on Wyatt. He pulls the face of Bray so the ref breaks it up. He puts Bray in the corner and hammers away at him. Bray reverses an irish whip and throws Dean into the corner. Slam and headbutt by Bray. Ambrose with repeated shots to the body of Bray. Bray hits that running high impact elbow. We head to break.

We return and Bray is in control of Dean. During the break Wyatt hit a superplex to take control. Wyat does a suplex that Wyatt ends up just throwing Ambrose in the middle of. Ambrose rolls to the outside but Wyatt is on the chase. Ambrose and Wyatt end up both connecting with a nasty clothesline. Both men make it in at 9. The two exchange blows, Dean ends up taking control until he tries for the Lunatic clothesline. Bray had it spotted and blasts Ambrose with a huge clothesline of his own. Bray puts Dean on the top turnbuckle but Ambrose fights back. Ambrose comes off the top but gets caught. Ambrose counters and tries Dirty Deeds but Bray fights out and rolls to the outside. Ambrose tries the suicide dive but gets caught and put in Sister Abigail! Dean fights out of it but gets planted into the barricade but Wyatt. Back in the ring Ambrose hits the Lunatic Clothesline. He hits an elbow from the top rope!


The rest of the Wyatt Family surround the ring. They start beating down Ambrose and Bray joins in. Dean gets put in Sister Abigail. Wyatt poses with his family and Triple H's music hits. Hunter makes his way down to the ring. Bray gets in the face of Hunter and then stares down at the WWE Championship. Bray backs away and the Wyatt Family leaves the ring. Triple H takes off his tie and suit jacket. Triple H goes and clears off the announce table. As he gets back in Ambrose pops up and puts Triple H in Dirty Deeds and connects! Ambrose grabs the WWE Championship and holds it up to close the show.

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